Dust and Sunshine
by feverfooted
Summary: Nico has been on the run for two years. He's left everything he previously knew behind with the desperate hope that it will help him escape the dark memories that plague him. However, when he meets Will Solace, a medical student at a college in London, running doesn't seem so inviting anymore. (rated T for later chapters)
1. Chapter 1

The late autumn breeze held that distinct quality that could only mean the onslaught of a storm—shivering with cold, whispering of wind that was yet to be. Already the windows were beginning to fog over as the temperature dropped, turning the rooms beyond into a maze of blurs and shadows.

His footsteps were light as he darted across the stone sidewalk despite the fact that he wore heavy black combat boots. There was only a slight _crunch crunch_ as he made his way through the streets, as if the sidewalk was refusing to acknowledge his presence.

Nico pulled the beanie down, attempting to cover his ears. His breath escaped his mouth in wispy tendrils as he exhaled. He really hated the cold. He hated it with a passion.

As he crossed yet another road he felt his cell phone buzz in his pocket. Fumbling for a second (his fingers were nearly numb) he fished the phone out and glanced at the screen.

 _Where are you? The coffee is getting cold_.

Nico rolled his eyes before responding, his numb fingers moving sluggishly across the keyboard.

 _I'll be there in 2 minutes._

He clicked send and tucked the phone back in his pocket, picking up his pace. He was aching to get out of the cold and into the warmth of the café. Night had begun to settle on the city, casting an orange glow over the buildings as the darkness descended.

The door chimed cheerily as he pushed it open. A wall of heat met him, pushing his unruly dark hair out of his eyes—if only temporarily. His eyes scanned the room, taking in the squashy armchairs (most of them occupied) and the wall of photos situated behind the ordering counter. Soft violin music carried through the still air, intermingling with the strong odor of coffee and freshly baked pastries.

"Nico!"

Nico turned toward the sound, spotting a familiar face in the back corner of the café. Though he had long since stopped smiling, the edges of his lips curled upward ever so slightly when he caught sight of the person sitting there, next to the window.

Nico sat down in the chair across from him, taking in every detail. His hair was golden blonde like he remembered, perpetually ruffled as if he had just escaped a wind storm.

"Hey," said Nico breathlessly, a slight waver to his voice. He had never really been good with social interactions, something that had only gotten worse since the accident.

Jason smiled at him from across the table, his eyes glittering with warmth and kindness. A pair of glasses rested on his nose, the lenses reflecting the muted lighting in the room.

A wave of relief swept through Nico. He had somehow expected Jason to be…different in some way. A different person that had moved on and left him behind, like everyone else had. But here he was, wearing one of his characteristic preppy sweaters and that calm, heroic-like smile that always made Nico wonder what he was thinking.

"It's been a while," said Jason, pushing a cup of coffee toward him.

"Yeah," said Nico, wrapping his fingers around the ceramic mug, grateful for the near-scalding heat. A moment of silence stretched between them, only punctuated when Nico realized that he should probably say something else.

"How have you been?" he asked, glancing up from his cup of coffee.

Jason took a sip of his own drink. "I've been good! I got a new job in central London that pays pretty well, so I moved into a bigger apartment, which is always fun."

Nico nodded absentmindedly. Of course Jason's life was going well. He was _Jason_ after all. He was one of the most charismatic people Nico had ever met. He wasn't sure what he had expected. Nico raised the mug to his lips and took a long sip, relishing the feeling of the hot drink tracing a path down to his stomach.

"And," continued Jason, leaning in a little over the table, so Nico could see the thin white scar on his lip. "I've met someone."

Nico swallowed hastily, coughing as the hot liquid seared his throat.

"You what?" he managed, dabbing at his face with a napkin.

Jason sat back in his chair, looking smug. His clear blue eyes glinted cheerfully.

"I wasn't expecting it," Jason admitted. "It kind of all just…happened."

"What's her name?" said Nico, a bit warily. Romantic endeavors were something that he had never been comfortable with. It was only because Jason was his friend that he didn't change the topic completely.

"Piper," said Jason, saying the name in a way that made Nico shift uneasily in his seat. Obviously this girl meant a lot to him—and this was precisely the reason why Nico was so uncomfortable. Affection had always bothered him, partially due to the fact that he had never really experienced it himself. He couldn't understand how two people could unite in such a way, creating a bond different from any other relationship.

"Ah," said Nico softly, looking into the depths of his mug, as if that could provide an escape from the topic.

Jason seemed oblivious to Nico's discomfort. "We've been dating for six months. She's moved in with me, can you believe that?"

Nico chanced a glance at Jason, his dark eyelashes fluttering upward.

"A bit quick, isn't it?" he questioned.

Jason shook his head slightly, his gaze far away. "She's perfect. I knew it when we first met. We just _connect_. You get that, right?"

"Sure," said Nico quietly, though he didn't get it, not at all.

"Enough about me," said Jason, his eyes returning to Nico's. "What have you been up to?"

Nico fiddled with the edge of his napkin, not really sure how to begin. The last thing he wanted was Jason's pity, but that was almost inevitable. For what felt like the hundredth time he mentally cursed himself for being so pathetic.

"Well," he began slowly. "After…you know. The accident. I decided to leave America."

Jason nodded, his smile slipping slightly.

Nico cleared his throat. "I just needed to get away."

"Understandable," said Jason, his voice quieter now, as if he was trying not to frighten a skittish animal.

"I travelled a bit. I wasn't really sure where I wanted to be. Nothing felt right," said Nico, willing his words to come out as monotone as possible. "And then I found myself in London. I heard that you were living here…" Nico's voice trailed off. There were gaping holes in his story—you simply couldn't sum up the last two years of your life in a few sentences—but he knew he couldn't say what had really been going on during that time. He didn't want Jason to worry. Jason, who had never been anything but kind to him didn't deserve to feel bad for someone like Nico. Even if Nico still blamed him for what had happened.

"And now we're here," finished Jason, his voice still soft.

They were both silent, the ambient noise of the café attempting to fill the space between them—and failing. In truth there was so, _so_ much more separating them now, the past two years only a minor factor.

"Have you met anyone?" asked Jason at last, obviously attempting to lighten the mood.

"What do you mean?" said Nico quickly; though he had a feeling he knew what Jason was on about.

"You know." Jason winked and realization hit him. A dull flush crept across Nico's cheeks.

"No," he said shortly, reaching for his coffee again. He raised the cup to his lips and took a big gulp.

Nico swallowed and set the cup down again, slightly harder than he meant to. It clattered against the wooden table, the coffee sloshing up the side of the mug. Jason's eyes were still on his, thoughtful behind his glasses.

"You know, I could find someone for you," he said seriously, excitement creeping through his words. "I'm sure there's a nice guy that would—"

"Stop," said Nico sharply, glancing around quickly to see if anyone was listening in on their conversation.

Jason blinked. "Nico, I didn't mean to—"

Nico shook his head quickly. "I don't want to talk about it," he said stiffly. When he had told Jason his secret he had somehow thought that that would be the end of it. He had never anticipated Jason asking about whom he had a crush on or the horrible awkwardness when Jason tried to point out guys for him. Even though it had felt good at the time to confide in someone, he had quickly started to regret the decision. Jason tried too hard, and in the end it had just pushed Nico away.

"Fine," said Jason easily, though Nico could tell that he had irritated him. "So, what are you planning on doing in London?"

"I'm not sure," said Nico honestly, looking out the window. Night had fully collected, the store windows glittering in the darkness.

"Have you thought about going to university?" asked Jason.

Nico turned back toward him in surprise. "University?"

Jason shrugged. "Why not? There are some nice ones around here. They're good about financial aid too, if that's what you would need."

Nico met Jason's eyes thoughtfully, trying to see past the clear blue and into his mind. What was he thinking?

"I don't know," he said at last. "I've kind of gotten used to moving around whenever I feel like it. I'm not sure if I could handle staying in one place for so long."

"Nico, I know that you haven't been happy these past two years. And it's not your fault…what happened. Really. You could start over here. Take a few classes. I'm here for you. I can help you with whatever you need."

Nico swallowed hard. He had never been comfortable with displays of emotion or affection, and Jason's voice was undeniably laced with both.

"Thanks," he managed. "I'll think about it."

Jason's eyes sparkled. "Good. I want you to be happy."

 _I want to be happy too_ , Nico thought. Deep down, however, he doubted that he ever would be again.

Jason checked his watch.

"Well, I hate to cut this meeting short, but I really have to be going," he said apologetically. "Piper's waiting for me."

Nico nodded as Jason pulled on his coat.

"I'll see you soon, alright?" he said, reaching out his hand for Nico to shake.

Nico took his hand and shook it, trying his hardest to absorb some of Jason's warmth. But all too soon Jason was leaving, and Nico was alone, with only a cup of cold coffee sitting in front of him.


	2. Chapter 2

It was well past ten o'clock when Nico finally arrived at his flat. The stars were glimmering brightly, casting a dull glow on the weathered cobblestones.

Nico shouldered the heavy door open and proceeded inside, flipping on the lights as he did so. The fluorescent bulbs flickered on hesitantly, spluttering to life.

He flopped down on his bed, the dark comforter crinkling beneath him. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands, more out of habit than tiredness. The caffeine from the coffee was still pulsing through his veins, and besides, his insomnia usually kept him awake well into the night. He had a feeling that he wouldn't be going to sleep any time soon.

His cold fingers found the laces of his combat boots and he loosened them considerably before tugging the shoes off his tired feet. He was a wanderer, and his feet showed it. His soles were covered in callouses, the skin rough to the touch.

Nico stood and stretched, reaching his hands toward the low ceiling cracked from water damage. While mentally he didn't feel tired, his body was exhausted. Walking around all day took more effort than he would have thought.

A smudged mirror hung on one wall and he stepped forward to peer into it. It had been a while since he checked what he looked like.

The last two years definitely hadn't been kind to him. His once-olive skin had paled and now was stretched across his face tightly, throwing emphasis onto his high cheekbones. His eyes were dark and hollowed, shadows rimming them from countless sleepless nights. And his hair…it hung wildly around his face, partially obscuring his eyes. He hadn't realized how long it was getting. With everything that had been going on, a haircut seemed like the least of his priorities.

He turned away with a sigh. He looked like someone who had been to hell and back…and in a way, he kind of had.

Nico threw himself back onto the bed, face down, eyes closed. For what felt like the millionth time he found himself wondering how he had gotten to this point in his life. After the accident, he had watched as his world shattered apart around him. Everything he knew had been ripped away from him, and not for the first time in his lifetime. Maybe this was the life he was destined to live—a life of isolation and wandering and a darkness that he just couldn't shake no matter how hard he tried.

Jason's face swam behind his eyelids. He heard the conversation in his mind, echoing through the quiet.

 _Have you thought about going to university?_

Nico inhaled shallowly, breathing in the somewhat stale smell of his comforter. Surprisingly, he had considered it a few times during the past two years. If everything had gone as planned, he would be starting college shortly. He was eighteen now. He should be worried about classes and grades, not about when the money would inevitably run out and what he would do when that happened.

He rolled onto his back, his eyes tracing the cracks in the ceiling. Not for the first time he thought about how much he disliked his apartment. It was a studio, cramped and tiny, with one room and a bathroom that barely passed as a bathroom. There was a kitchenette situated in the far corner, but he had no idea how to cook anything. Most of the time he just ate takeout. It was easier that way. A single grimy window let in a small amount of moonlight, but did little to filter the air. The whole place smelled old and musty.

He hadn't been in London long enough to bother with furnishings. He was so used to moving after about a month or so that décor held no appeal to him whatsoever. With the money dwindling he had focused on the bare basics. It was a rough way to live, but he had managed so far.

 _It's not your fault…what happened._

Nico shut his eyes tight as the words filled his mind. He knew Jason meant well, but he had heard the phrase so many times that it no longer held any meaning. No one had been there when it happened. No one else had felt the world around him shatter apart like the glass that had littered the asphalt after it happened. He would always blame himself for what happened. No one could tell him otherwise.

 _You could start over here. Take a few classes._

Nico desperately wanted to start over. God, did he want to start over. If only he could rewind those last few moments before it happened. The memories had plagued him mercilessly over the next two years. No matter how far he travelled, he couldn't escape the guilt that ate away at him like acid. And worse, he could never escape the nightmares, shaking him awake in the dead of night, leaving him gasping and shuddering, tears streaking his cheeks. Maybe it would be good for him to stay in London for a while. Jason was here, and Jason was the closest thing to a friend that he would get. Jason was the only one that wouldn't shrink away when they saw him, with his ratty hair and sunken eyes. Jason was the only one that didn't treat him like an outcast.

 _I'm here for you. I can help you with whatever you need._

All at once Nico's mind was made up. He needed a change—needed it more than anything else. This lifestyle was slowly fading him, and he knew that. He couldn't keep running forever, as much as he'd like to.

With that in mind he sat up suddenly, renewed strength coursing through him. He tugged his combat boots back on and shrugged on his old aviator jacket before heading outside once more.


	3. Chapter 3

Dawn had just begun to streak the horizon with pinks and golds when Nico left the all-night Internet café. He held a packet of papers under his arm, neatly stapled. It had been difficult, but he had finally completed the application for the local community college. He wasn't sure if they would accept him, due to the fact that he hadn't graduated from high school, and he didn't have nearly enough money to pay for tuition, but he figured it was worth a shot.

Though he hadn't slept at all, he felt wide-awake. Energy was returning to him that he didn't know he still had—an energy that pulsed through his veins, waking the cells and whispering to every neuron in his brain: _this is your chance._ Despite the fact that his application was mediocre at best, he couldn't help but feel optimistic. Maybe this was the part in his life where things would finally start going right for him.

He stopped by the post office to buy a large envelope and tucked the application inside carefully before sealing it up.

This was his chance. He could feel it.

A month passed. Nico did what he always did: walk until his feet refused to take another step, only returning to his flat when absolutely necessary. He met with Jason, who was absolutely thrilled with this news.

"Jason, are you crying?" Nico asked, horrified, as Jason's eyes began to fill with a shimmering sheen of tears behind his glasses.

"I'm just happy for you, that's all," Jason said, smiling broadly and sniffling.

However, as the cold began to grip the city in an iron-gray glove, Nico's short-lived confidence began to falter. Doubt began to creep around the edges of his mind like the frost forming above his doorstep. What was he thinking, turning in an application to a university when he had done little to deserve a place there? There were countless other applicants that were undoubtedly better qualified and much better suited for a university education.

The cold did little to ease his dark thoughts. He had heard that it rarely snowed in London, but according to the locals, it seemed as if this year could be the year that changed that. The temperature just kept dropping, and with it, Nico's perceived sense of achievement. Of course. The one year he ended up in London and it was the coldest in history.

And then, it happened.

He arrived home after a long day of walking about, the tip of his nose bright pink and his fingers completely numb. He was in the process of attempting to force the key into the lock when his boot made contact with something nestled next to the door. He looked down, spotting a weathered brown envelope, stained by melting ice. He picked it up, his heart beating roughly against his chest—pounding out a rhythm of both excitement and anxiety.

Once inside his flat he ripped open the package, not bothering to stop and change out of his jacket and dirty shoes. He fumbled with the papers, cursing his cold fingers and his lack of adequate gloves and as an extension, all of London and its crummy weather.

The papers came free from the envelope at last.

 _Congratulations_.

Nico's legs gave out as he skimmed the first line. He fell backward onto his bed, his eyes still latched on to that word. That word that was likely to change everything.

 _You have been accepted…_

Nico closed his eyes and held the paper close to his chest, a strange emotion ripping through him. A few years ago he never would have expected to feel this way about getting into college, but under the circumstances, this was the best thing that had happened to him in a long, _long_ time. These past two years he had been drifting, a mere shade of the Nico he used to be. He hadn't had a place to stay. No matter how far he travelled he had never been able to rest in one place. He had to be constantly moving, constantly trying to shake the dark memories that wouldn't ever truly leave him. He hadn't realized just how _sad_ he had been until this happiness swept through him.

 _Come to the campus next Saturday, 9 am, for orientation…_

Now this, this would definitely make Jason cry.


	4. Chapter 4

Saturday drifted forward slowly, much too slowly for Nico's taste. Jason insisted on getting him some new clothes, which Nico didn't agree with.

"You can't go to college orientation wearing steel-toed combat boots and a dirty T-shirt with a skull on it," chided Jason. "Everyone will think you're _dark_ or something."

"I am dark," said Nico flatly. "I am the night, and all of the creatures that lurk in it."

Jason rolled his eyes. "Seriously man, I'm not letting you go like this. Come on."

Nico had fought him the whole way, but somehow he ended up with a nice winter coat (black, because he flat out refused to get any other color), some new jeans (black as well, though Jason talked him out of the suffocatingly tight ones) and a thick gray sweater.

"See, was that so bad?" asked Jason as they left the store with their purchases, Jason holding the bags. He sounded tired but pleased with himself all the same.

Nico shrugged. "It was pretty awful."

Jason shoved him in the arm but laughed all the same.

"Hey, let's get some coffee," suggested Jason as they rounded the corner. A Starbucks was tucked into the row of buildings, their brightly colored banners advertising hot chocolate.

"Um…" Nico thought of his wallet, and the dwindling money in his bank account.

"Don't worry, this one's on me," said Jason, smiling kindly.

"You really don't need to do that," stammered Nico.

Jason just took his arm and steered him towards the Starbucks.

Once inside they were forced to wait in line. A group of girls were chatting loudly in front of them. They were around the same age as him, Nico thought. They were all bundled in fuzzy scarves and sweaters. One of them glanced behind her, and for a moment their eyes met. Nico looked away quickly, his eyes fixing on Jason instead, who was squinting at the menu.

"What do you want?" asked Jason. "I think I'm going to go for the hot chocolate. I don't like whip cream though. Do you think that would be a problem?"

Nico sighed with forced exasperation. "I'll eat the whip cream for you," he said sarcastically. "If it really bothers you that much."

The girls seemed to have heard this comment, as they all started to giggle and look over their shoulders at them.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry but you two are _so cute_ ," said one of the girls, turning to face them. She had dark hair and pale skin.

Nico felt his cheeks begin to grow warm. He feigned a sudden interest in his boots.

"Um thank you," said Jason, barely batting an eye. Of course. He probably got complemented like this all the time.

"How long have you two been together?" asked another girl excitedly. Her skin was dark, the color of milk chocolate.

Nico looked up in alarm, his insides recoiling upon themselves.

Jason laughed easily, which was a wonder, considering that Nico was about two seconds from running for it.

"Oh, we're not a couple," said Jason. "We're just friends. Right Nico?"

Nico forced himself to meet the gaze of the girls. "Yes. Just friends," he said stiffly.

"Are you sure?" asked the first girl, her eyes widening in surprise. "You know, it's totally okay if you are! It's 2015 after all."

The other girls nodded in encouragement while Jason assured them that really, they were just friends out to get coffee together. But Nico didn't hear any of it. Instead he heard the voices in his head that had tormented him as a child, convincing him that if dared tell anyone his secret he would be even more of an outcast than he already was. His childhood flickered behind his eyes. Years of him hiding, refusing to tell anyone, though the secret burned inside him.

Nico turned and hurried out of the shop, shouldering open the door, the brisk air like a slap to the face. He was nearly out of the mall when someone grabbed his arm, jerking him backwards.

"What the hell was that?"

It was Jason, his glasses speckled with rain, a furious expression on his face.

Nico tried to tug himself free of Jason's grasp, but he held on with a vice-like grip.

"Let me go," said Nico coldly, twisting in an attempt to get away.

"Seriously Nico, what's your problem?" asked Jason. "Those girls just misunderstood. There was no reason for you to storm out like that."

"You couldn't understand," snarled Nico, feeling irrationally angry. When he got like this, it was best for him to be alone. He tended to hurt anyone who had the misfortune of crossing his path.

"What, because I'm not gay?" said Jason. His voice had dropped to an almost-whisper, his words nearly lost on the wind.

Nico wrenched himself free at last, his dark eyes flashing.

"Just leave me alone," he said. He turned and stalked away, his pace brisk. He didn't look back to see Jason's look of anger thinly veiling the true sadness that he undoubtedly felt for Nico.

 _I bet he only wanted to spend time with me because he feels bad for me_ , thought Nico to himself bitterly as he wove in and out through the pedestrians and tourists flocking the sidewalk.

He reached his flat at last and locked himself inside. The air was cold and still in here, and he could see his breath fanning out in front of him with every exhale.

He pressed his palms into his eyes, not moving them until stars darted behind his eyelids.

Maybe he shouldn't have told Jason his secret. All it had done was cause problems.

Nico sat there in the dimly lit apartment, regret roiling through him like bubbling acid. He should have known better. Keeping to himself had gotten him through life just fine.

All at once a wave of exhaustion washed over him. He thought back to the night before and couldn't remember if he had ever actually fallen asleep. He yearned for an escape into the darkness where he could leave his feelings behind and be at peace—if only for a few hours.

Without bothering to change he curled up on the bed. For once, he fell asleep without any trouble.


	5. Chapter 5

When he woke the apartment was darker than usual. The single grimy window glowed with a faint orange light, signaling the coming nightfall.

Nico stayed still, for a few moments his mind completely blank. Then, slowly but surely thoughts began to scatter through his brain like dead leaves in a brisk wind. He rubbed a hand over his eyes before sitting up and stretching, reaching his arms high above his head. He felt better rested than he had in months.

He stood and yawned before pushing open the door. He needed some fresh air.

A gust of frigid air met him as he shoved the door open. He shivered despite his heavy jacket. What was the deal with this weather?

He was about to turn around to return inside when he noticed a plastic bag nestled in the corner of his porch. He instantly recognized it as the bag of clothes he had bought earlier today. He cursed himself inwardly, remembering that he had forgotten to take the bag from Jason before he left. Jason must have dropped this off for him when he was sleeping.

Nico stooped to pick up the bag and stepped back inside, his insides feeling hollow.

He turned the plastic bag upside down on the bed and let the contents fall out. Jacket, sweater, jeans. All landing in a heap upon the dark comforter. A piece of paper fluttered out of the bag like a lost butterfly and he deftly grabbed it out of the air.

Nico knew what it was before he even saw the cramped handwriting covering the page. In some spots the ink had collected in large dots, as if Jason had been unsure what to say, his pen motionless on the paper.

 _Nico,_

 _I know that you're still upset about what happened. And I don't blame you. But honestly, I'm trying to help you. That's all I've ever been trying to do. If I don't understand, it's your job to make me understand. You don't need to be alone anymore. Please stop pushing me away._

 _-Jason_

 _PS: Good luck if you try to avoid me. I know where you live._

Nico reread the note three times before setting it aside, his feelings mixed. He knew Jason, and he was positive that Jason was being honest about trying to help him.

Some habits were hard to break away from, however. He had been living on his own for so long, he had forgotten what it was like to have other people to count on for help. But maybe he would be able to let Jason back into his life. After all, he had been one of the few people that he considered a friend before that horrible night when everything changed.

With a sigh of resignation he pulled out his cell phone and began typing a message to Jason.


	6. Chapter 6

Saturday dawned bright and cold. Nico woke quickly, easily shaking off the shadows of sleep. He dressed, pulling on the new clothes, relishing how they felt against his skin. All of his clothes had been worn so much that they were rough to the touch, many in desperate need of a mend. The jeans were comfortable and clean—when was the last time his black jeans had felt clean? The sweater fit well and almost— _almost_ blocked out the crisp air.

He tugged on his combat boots and jacket and headed out, the directory that had been included in his acceptance packet safely tucked in his pocket.

He left the apartment feeling lighter than he had in years. Instead of a heavy knot of guilt and regret in his stomach, a new sensation was filling him, making each step feel lighter than air. He searched for a word for it, several seconds ticking by before he was able to choose one: _purpose_. For so long he had lacked a sense of purpose. But now it was here, undeniably, irrevocably here, lighting his veins on fire, making each step worth it for once.

He arrived at the campus after about half an hour. The buildings loomed up in front of him, each one made from bricks. The campus was a clash between old and new—between the brick buildings were smaller, newer additions, painted brightly, made from glass and metal. The sky was stormy and irritable as usual, gray clouds concealing the sun. It would probably rain soon.

Nico found his way to the meeting spot where all of the incoming freshmen were supposed to gather. There was already a small gathering there, the students looking bright and cheerful. A few gave him strange looks as he approached, undoubtedly wondering why someone that looked like he did was standing so close to them. Nico stayed a safe distance away, trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

It was a few minutes before the guide arrived—a tall man with salt-and-pepper hair and an air of superiority that Nico instantly disliked. He was dressed formally, in a dress shirt and pants and a fancy overcoat.

"Hello everyone!" he said, his voice heavy with an English accent. "I am going to be your guide for today. You can call me Mr. White."

His eyes met Nico's and a smirk crossed his lips, his expression telling him that he believed that Nico had no place here. Nico felt his stomach clench with anger but tried to force the feelings down. He wouldn't let this guy he had just met ruin his mood.

The man took them through the campus, pointing out the various buildings and their functions. The dorms, the cafeteria, the hospital where the medical students got hands on experience. Nico drifted through most of it, not really paying attention to the things that didn't concern him. He perked up a bit when Mr. White pointed out the art studio—Nico had chosen art as an elective. He tried to look inside but they passed too quickly for him to see anything. He stuffed his hands in his pockets, trying not to let irritation cloud his mind.

They finished the tour after about an hour of walking around. The other freshmen were muttering complaints about their feet hurting, and Nico couldn't help but chuckle a little to himself. An hour of walking was nothing compared to what he did on a regular basis.

"Any questions?" asked Mr. White, his words clipped with impatience.

A few people asked questions, but Nico wasn't listening. His mind had already drifted to other things as he had conditioned it to do. His mind wandered as much as he did, if not more. He really wanted to look inside the art studio—drawing had been something that he had once enjoyed, back in his other life. He had given up on the hobby for a while, but he had decided that this was as good a time as ever to start again.

"Alright, that will conclude the orientation," Mr. White was saying. Nico looked up, his focus snapping back to the guide. "I look forward to seeing all of you on campus," he continued, though his words were empty of meaning.

The crowd dispersed, the students talking amongst themselves excitedly. Nico moved through them, retracing his steps back to the art studio that they had passed earlier. He reached the building after a few minutes. It was painted a bright shade of blue, the windows arched and glossy. The rain had begun to fall, splattering against the glass, making the room beyond appear distorted.

Nico pushed open the door gently, trying not to make a sound.

The studio was a large room, brightly lit. The walls were completely covered in artwork—canvasses and sketches and even some paintings on the walls themselves. The ceiling was high and sloped, dark wood beams racing back and forth overhead. There were four rows of desks, white but splattered with ink and paint. Nico instantly felt himself liking the place.

"Hi. Are you lost?"

Nico jumped. He had been so busy admiring the room that he hadn't noticed the boy sitting at the far end of the studio, working at an easel. He was wearing a smock over a blue thermal long-sleeve shirt. There was a paint brush in one of his hands, still stained with red paint. It was clear that he was in the middle of working on his painting.

Nico struggled for a moment to find his voice. The boy was looking at him expectantly, his expression kind and curious.

"Oh—N-no I'm not lost," he began shakily, before clearing his throat and starting again. "I just wanted to see the art studio."

"That's great!" said the boy, smiling brightly and standing up. From this distance Nico could tell that he was taller than him by about five or six inches. "I can show you around." His accent was British, light and smooth and almost completely different from Mr. White's. Nico hadn't yet gotten used to all the different variations of accents he encountered in London, but he found himself liking this boy's way of speaking.

The boy came closer, so only one row of desks separated them. He had curly blonde hair. It was messy but in a contained sort of way, unlike Nico's hair that had a mind of its own. His eyes were blue and crystal clear, glimmering with kindness. His skin was evenly tanned and a light dusting of freckles covered his cheeks. Everything about him radiated happiness and purity. A strange feeling twisted in Nico's gut, but he ignored it.

"My name's Will, by the way," he said, climbing over the remaining row of desks to stand in front of Nico. He held out a hand to shake and Nico took it. His fingers were warm, almost hot to the touch, and Nico pulled away quickly.

"I'm Nico DiAngelo," said Nico, meeting his eyes with difficulty. His blue eyes seemed to be boring into his.

"Well, Nico DiAngelo," said Will, his voice dropping conspiratorially, as if he was letting him in on some sort of grand secret. "This is where the magic happens." He spread his arms wide, motioning to everything around them.

"This is the sink, where the paint is relinquished from the brushes," said Will, pointing to the sink.

"Relinquished?" questioned Nico.

Will blinked and a moment of silence passed between them. Nico began to panic, thinking he had made a mistake already. Then Will laughed, the sound like sunshine.

"I apologize. I write a lot of terrible poetry and sometimes I just forget who I'm talking to," he said.

"Oh, it's not a problem," said Nico, trying to beat down his awkwardness without a lot of luck.

"Really?" said Will, looking surprised. "My friends hate it."

He kept moving and Nico followed, looking at the artwork on the walls. Everything was very well done and he tried not to be intimidated. He had been good at drawing before he gave up on it, so hopefully he could pick up where he left off.

"Here's the paint cupboard," added Will, sliding a glass door to the side to reveal rows and rows of paint.

They kept walking, Will pointing out more things as they went along. Nico found himself paying less attention to what he was saying and more to the weird feeling in his stomach. He suspected it had something to do with the boy in front of him, but he wasn't quite sure. Usually he disliked people on sight as a general rule. But Will—he was different. Maybe it was the way that he seemed to radiate warmth.

"And this is my current masterpiece," said Will, gesturing to the easel and snapping Nico out of his jumbled thoughts.

Nico took a step forward, so he stood next to Will. The painting was a jumble of colors, each line bold and clear. The lines each connected in a way that created a shape of some sort—Nico could tell that it was supposed to be _something_ but he wasn't sure what. It kind of looked like a misshapen blob.

"It's supposed to be a representation of myself," said Will.

"It looks like a potato," blurted Nico without thinking.

The wave of regret was instantaneous. Great. He had barely just met this guy and already he had ruined any chance of making a friend. He was planning an escape through the window when Will laughed again, the sound musical and clear.

"Well, that's the most honest review I've gotten so far," he said, his words barely making it around his laugh.

"That's not what I meant," said Nico, feeling helpless.

"No, no, it's okay," said Will, gasping for air as he calmed down. "That's what it looks like to me too. I'm a pretty terrible artist, but I'm taking this class as an elective so I can improve my skills. Doesn't seem like it's working though," he added.

"Wait, so you're not an art major?" asked Nico, confused.

"Not even close," said Will, sitting on the desk so he was facing Nico. "I'm going to be a junior here when the semester starts again. I'm a medical student."

"Ah," said Nico. He paused before speaking, determined to collect his thoughts. "I'm taking art as an elective too," he began. "But my major is undecided."

"Hey, we're probably in the same class then," said Will excitedly. "You can tell me my art sucks all year long."

"I never said that your painting sucked," said Nico defensively, though he could tell that Will was joking.

"It's alright," said Will, still smiling. His teeth were straight and pearly white against his tan skin. "Are you good at art?"

Nico shrugged, not wanting to come across as boastful. "I used to be. I haven't practiced in a long time though."

"I'm sure you'll be great," said Will, and Nico felt himself blush against his better judgement.

A moment of silence stretched between them, only punctuated when Nico chose to speak.

"I should probably get going," he said, though he was reluctant to leave. There was something about this boy that called out to him, whispering to every molecule that he was composed of. He wanted to stay and just listen to him talk. He wanted to feel the warmth that wafted off of him in waves, making him forget why he had ever been cold in the first place.

"Oh. Alright," said Will. Was Nico imagining it, or did Will sound disappointed?

Nico turned to leave when Will spoke. "Um…if you ever need any help or anything, you can ask me," he blurted out. He scribbled something on a scrap of paper and handed it to Nico. Nico looked down at it and with a start he realized that it was a phone number.

"Thanks," said Nico. "I guess I'll see you soon," he added.

Will smiled at him one last time before Nico left, pushing open the door and stepping out into the rain.

The strange feeling had returned, twisting through his stomach, jumbling his thoughts. He wasn't completely sure, but he guessed it had something to do with the scrap of paper in his pocket.

And though he had long since stopped smiling, he couldn't help but let the corners of his mouth curve upward ever so slightly.


	7. Chapter 7

The next few days passed in a sluggish blur. Nico couldn't really keep his mind still. It kept wandering to the most useless places—Will's laugh that was so much like summer. The way he had looked at him like a person and not something that had crawled from the gutter. The freckles that patterned his cheeks like constellations. And more than anything else, he couldn't help but think of the scrap of paper that Will had given him.

The phone number was currently stuck in the corner of his mirror back in his dingy flat. Nico found his gaze wandering to the piece of paper with a dangerous frequency. Once he had even dialed the number, simply staring at the screen, his heart thudding restlessly in his chest. But he had closed the phone before he had a chance to make a fool of himself. What would he say, anyway? They had barely met. It wasn't like they were friends or anything.

The fact that Will had even given him his phone number nagged at Nico endlessly. The majority of his brain told him he was just being friendly—believe it or not, some people were just genuinely kind. But there was a tiny part of him that whispered _he was flirting with you_.

Nico pushed this thought away with ferocity every time it crossed his mind. There was simply no way that someone like Will would ever go for someone like Nico. They were almost complete polar opposites, for Christ's sake. Besides, it would be unfair to force anyone to put up with his past and the darkness that lurked inside him.

And anyway, just because Nico was gay, that didn't mean that every guy was. He had learned that the hard way. He had taught himself that it was far better to keep his feelings tucked away where they were in no danger of offending anyone.

So in the end, he crumpled the scrap of paper up in the palm of his hand and threw it away, though he couldn't help but picture Will sitting in his flat somewhere, wondering why Nico hadn't called. He pushed the image away, knowing that he was being ridiculous.

By now November was dwindling to a close. The Christmas season had blossomed in full force, the decorations spreading like wildfire. Glittering lights hung from every surface and it seemed like the air was perpetually tinted with the smell of cinnamon.

Term wasn't scheduled to start until January, but Nico couldn't help but find himself wandering around the campus. He told himself that he simply liked the college environment, but there was a sliver of him that hoped he would run into Will. It was only a sliver of him, but he found it impossible to deny nevertheless. He knew he was being silly—he had thrown away Will's phone number, after all—but that didn't stop him from hoping.

And, believe it or not, his secret silent prayer was answered.

Nico's collar was turned up, trying to fight off the biting cold as he trudged along, carving out his usual path through the campus. There weren't many people out; he suspected that anyone with a grain of sense was staying inside, where it was warm. The cold bit at him, sending icy needles through his exposed skin, making him feel as if his lungs were freezing solid.

He was passing the hospital when a voice carried over to him, almost lost on the wind.

"Nico!"

Nico turned to look over his shoulder, spotting a familiar figure hurrying towards him. He couldn't help but feel his heart lurch in excitement. There was no denying now that he had wanted to see Will again, not now that he was in front of him, a thick scarf wrapped around his neck and mittens on his hands.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here," said Will, his breath forming a misty cloud in front of him.

"Me neither," said Nico, even though that wasn't completely true. "Were you working at the hospital?"

Will nodded, visibly shivering. His cheeks were rosy from the cold, only furthering his gentle-hearted appearance. "It's part of my studies," he explained. "We get to work with actual patients. It's very interesting."

"I can imagine," said Nico, trying to keep the conversation going. He was determined not to screw this up like everything else in his life.

There was a moment of silence in which Will regarded him carefully, as if debating whether he should say something.

"Why didn't you call me?" he said suddenly, the words tumbling out of his mouth. A blush bloomed across his cheeks, and it was obvious that the question had surprised him. "Or text me or…anything."

Nico blinked, taken aback. This whole time he had thought that Will wouldn't notice if he didn't call, but apparently that wasn't quite true.

"Uh…" began Nico lamely, not knowing how to explain.

Will sighed, his breath an opaque cloud suspended between them. "If it's because you didn't want to talk to me, just say so. I don't want to bother you. I can come across as kind of…forward sometimes. I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable."

Nico's eyes widened in surprise.

"No, it wasn't like that at all," he said quickly. Will's eyes met his, and his expression was one of relief. Nico felt a twist of guilt in his stomach—he had made Will think that he was at fault when it was the other way around. "I just had a lot going on," he lied.

"Oh, alright," said Will, brightening. He paused and rubbed a mitten-clad hand over his neck. "Um…do you want to go to my flat? It's freezing out here."

Nico let the words sink in, processing them each individually before stringing them together.

"Sure," said Nico, a spark of hope flickering to life inside him. Maybe this friendship wasn't doomed after all.

"Really?" said Will, his eyes wide and shining like he had been expecting a different answer.

Nico shrugged and Will smiled.

"It's not too far from here," he said. "Only about a five-minute walk."

They began the trek to his flat, their footsteps echoing dully against the cobblestones. The sky had begun to darken overhead, casting a grayish gloom over the city.

Will glanced at the sky, frowning slightly.

"If we hurry we might be able to beat the rain," he said softly, almost to himself.

They picked up their pace, weaving their way towards a brick apartment building, the architecture very similar to that of the college.

The seconds passed in silence, though it wasn't unbearable or awkward in any way. Nico found himself being soothed by Will's presence.

Will led him into the building just as the clouds split open, the rain streaming down in a steady rhythm.

They stood for a moment in the lobby, staring out the windows to the street beyond. The rain fell in gray sheets, a cacophony of droplets shattering the still quiet.

"Well, it's a good thing we got here when we did," said Will, chuckling.

Nico nodded. He hated being wet almost as much as he hated the cold.

"My flat's just up this way," said Will, motioning to the elevator.

The chime dinged, signaling the arrival of the elevator. They stepped inside, and Nico did his best to keep some space between them. It was difficult. The elevator was small and they stood shoulder to shoulder. Nico could feel the silence stagnating, but his mind had gone blank. Maybe he was imagining it but he could feel the warmth radiating off of Will in slow waves.

Will shifted slightly and their fingers brushed. Nico jumped so violently that he slammed into the side of the elevator. A string of curses passed under his breath.

"You alright?" asked Will, casting him a sidelong glance. His eyes were bright with amusement.

"Uh—yeah," said Nico. He could feel his ears growing warm.

The next minute passed in a silence so thick that that Nico could have cut it with a knife. He decided that this must be the slowest goddamn elevator in the universe.

At long last the elevator doors opened and they stepped out into the space beyond. They had reached the twelfth floor, and a long corridor stretched out on either side.

"My flat's number 42," said Will, still oblivious to Nico's discomfort.

Nico nodded and followed Will down the hall, trying his hardest not to trip. It seemed as if all of his motor skills were failing him. What had happened to before, when they had walked together in comfortable silence? Nico traced it back to the elevator ride. It was almost as if being so close to Will had scrambled his brain cells, leaving him flailing. But that was such a ridiculous thought that Nico swept it away quickly.

They reached the door marked 42 at last. Will fished around in his pocket for a moment before retrieving a bronze key, scuffed with use.

The door swung open and Will stood aside to let Nico in first. Nico stepped inside, curiosity momentarily burning away his awkwardness.

It was a spacious flat, but it was filled to the brim, making it appear smaller. The walls were painted white but covered in posters and artwork and pictures. A fireplace was sunken into one wall, a large window spanning another. Strings of miniature electric paper lanterns crisscrossed the ceiling, casting a warm comfortable glow upon the room. There was a bookshelf crammed with books, and a squashy couch right in front of the fireplace, lined with brightly colored pillows.

"Sorry for the mess," said Will, seemingly gesturing to the apartment as a whole. He put his hands in his pockets, looking at Nico with a sheepish grin. Nico averted his eyes quickly. Will's expression was so _genuine_ it made him shift with unease.

"No, no, it's—really nice," said Nico, stuttering a little. He cleared his throat. "Is it just you living here?"

Will visibly relaxed, as if he had been worried what Nico was going to think of him based on the state of his apartment.

"Oh, I have a roommate," explained Will, pointing to a doorway that probably led to another part of the flat. "He's not here at the moment. He's in Australia for a few months studying abroad."

"Ah," said Nico, more out of a burning need to keep the silence at bay than to express his understanding.

"Make yourself at home," said Will, flashing him one of his dazzling smiles. "Do you want some tea?"

Nico hated tea, but he was reluctant to say so, thinking that he might sound rude. He searched his mind to try and remember if it was the British that took offense to a guest refusing food.

"Sure," said Nico, cursing his mental encyclopedia for failing him.

"Alright!" said Will, shrugging off his coat and scarf as he spoke. He wore a white T-shirt that showed his muscular arms, evenly tanned and speckled with freckles.

Will left through another door that must lead to the kitchen. Nico was left to look around the apartment for a few moments undisturbed. His feet carried him to one wall, where he let his eyes skim over all the pictures taped there. There were pictures of Will with a younger girl that shared his blue eyes and messy blonde hair—his sister maybe? Will, his arm around another guy with flaming red hair, both of them caught laughing. Will, standing at the peak of a mountain somewhere, looking back at the camera, his face crinkled with happiness.

Nico felt a strange pang of loss ripple through him. Here was evidence of a normal life, full of friends and family and careless adventure. A life that was undoubtedly normal for Will, yet completely out of reach for Nico.

A high-pitched whistle snapped Nico out of his thoughts. He quickly stepped away from the wall and plopped down on the couch, trying to look natural.

"Tea's just about ready!" called Will from the other room.

Nico sat back and let his eyes wander idly as Will prepared the tea. He couldn't help but feel strangely at home here in this cluttered apartment, despite the fact that he was terrified of doing something stupid or embarrassing. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with warm air. Outside the rain was relentless, drumming a steady beat against the wide window. Whatever happened, he wouldn't be able to leave until the rain stopped.

"Alright, it's ready," said Will, carrying a tray into the room, laden with a kettle, two teacups and bowl of sugar cubes. In addition, he was wearing a checkered apron, which seemed a little out of place considering that he had only boiled water.

Will set the tray down on the coffee table and sat down beside Nico.

"I wasn't sure how you like your tea, but I'm out of milk, so sugar's all I have," he said, pouring himself a cup and adding two cubes of sugar.

"That's fine," said Nico, a bit too quickly.

Will raised his cup to his lips, blowing across the surface of the drink gently.

"So, American, huh?" he asked, his lips still hovering over the cup.

Nico, who had been intent on pouring the tea, was caught a bit off guard by this sudden question. The kettle nearly slipped, but he managed to set it down before anything disastrous happened.

"What do you mean?" he asked, looking at Will, trying not to feel intimidated by those wide blue eyes.

"Well, your accent's American," said Will. It was a statement. "You from there?"

Nico blinked, and within the space of time it took for the darkness to close in, images flashed through his mind. Images of that night. The burning in his chest as he ran, without a destination, just anywhere _away_ from that street corner. The first of many plane rides, the sky tinged crimson like the asphalt had been.

Nico took a deep breath and looked down at his hands. Small, slender hands. Artists' hands. He willed his voice to be steady. The last thing he wanted was for Will to get dragged down in his dark past with him.

"Yes," he said slowly, meeting Will's eyes again. "I lived there for my whole life, but my parents were both Italian immigrants."

"So what brought you to London?" asked Will, taking a sip of his tea. "Adventure?"

"Something like that," said Nico quietly.

"I've always wanted to go to America," said Will, sitting back against the couch and looking thoughtful. "What's the Land of the Free like, anyway?"

Even though Nico hadn't been there in two years, he could still recall every detail of his past life easily, as if he had been there yesterday.

"It's…loud," he began. "And Americans are quite obnoxiously American, if you know what I mean."

Will laughed. "Alright then."

Nico shifted in his seat a little, the words coming smoother now. It was easier to talk about something he was familiar with.

"But it's not a bad place to live. I grew up in New York, so that was cool. Lots of places to explore…" He trailed off, for the first time since he had left a twist of homesickness in his stomach.

"Sounds brilliant," said Will, grinning.

"So…you're British?" asked Nico timidly, adding a sugar cube to his tea to avoid looking at Will.

Will glanced down at his tea and faked an expression of embarrassment. "The tea gave it away, didn't it?"

Nico hadn't been expecting an answer like this at all, and it caught him completely off guard. A small chuckle bubbled through him, surprising him even more. When was the last time he had _laughed_? The feeling felt raw and unnatural in his chest.

"A bit, yeah," said Nico, choking down the laugh.

"I grew up here, in London," said Will, looking pleased with himself. "My dad is British, but my mum is actually from France."

"Oh, cool," said Nico, though this didn't really seem like the right response.

"I always wished that I grew up somewhere else though," continued Will, his gaze a bit far away. "London always seemed so…gray compared to the rest of the world."

Nico glanced back at the window, where the rain was still pelting the glass relentlessly.

"It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't raining all the time," said Nico. He held the teacup in his palms, grateful for the warmth that seeped into his hands. He was still trying to figure out how to consume his tea without actually drinking it—he didn't want to appear rude, but he had always disliked the taste, and besides, it tended to give him a stomachache. He had always preferred coffee.

"So true," said Will, taking another sip of his drink, his eyes sliding back to rest on Nico. Nico felt the weight of Will's eyes on him, like the steady pressure of a hand on his shoulder. It was all he could do to keep from looking away like he always did. "Do you like the rain?" he added.

Nico shook his head, scattering dark hair in his eyes. He pushed it away quickly. "I hate the rain."

Will laughed over his tea, nearly spilling it everywhere. He brought the cup down from his lips and set it down on the table. "Really? You seem like you would."

Nico shrugged, wondering what about him said that he was a rain person.

"Do _you_ like rain?" he asked, after a pause.

Will mirrored his reaction to the same question. "I hate the rain too," he said, his lips quirked upward into a smile.

Coincidence or not, it was at that moment that the rain ceased abruptly, as if a switch had been flipped. Nico was suddenly aware of every sound he made—the rustle of fabric as he moved, each of his breaths. Watery sunlight filtered through the wide window, making Will's hair seem to sparkle.

"Would you look at that," said Will, standing and walking over to the window to peer outside. "The rain stopped!"

Nico, though a strange and unfamiliar part of him yearned to stay, knew that this was his cue to leave. It was probably better this way, to depart before he made a fool of himself or say something he would regret.

"I should get going," he said, setting his cup of tea back on the table and getting to his feet.

"Oh," said Will. Was it Nico's imagination, or did he sound a bit disappointed? "Alright then."

They both walked to the door. Will made it there first and opened the door for him, holding it open.

"This was nice," said Will, his words genuine.

"Yeah," said Nico, trying not to sound as confused as he felt. Usually things like this always ended in unbearable awkwardness resulting from Nico's inability to keep a conversation going. But this had been a pleasant change to that unpleasant trend.

"Um…maybe we could hang out again sometime," said Will, a bit sheepishly. He ran a hand over his forearm, almost absentmindedly.

Nico, one foot already out the door, paused. Whatever he had been expecting, that wasn't it. Nico turned to meet Will's eyes. They were wide an expectant, the color like a tropical coastline.

Nico found his voice after a beat, the words tumbling off his tongue before he had even decided on speaking.

"Sure. I'd like that."

And with that he turned and headed for the elevator, feeling considerably lighter.

Hey guys! Thanks for reading my story so far. This is the first fanfic I've posted in a LONG time, so I'd love reviews! I feel like I've progressed a lot as a writer over the years and I want to do these characters justice. The majority of this story is written, but not completely finished, so I'll be posting a lot of chapters. I've been working on it for about 6 months!

-Sid


	8. Chapter 8

The days began to blur together again, as they always seemed to do when Nico couldn't keep his mind still. He walked through London quicker than he usually did; as if part of him hoped that he could put distance between himself and his thoughts this way. It was a futile attempt—he should know by now that distance couldn't separate him from thoughts and memories.

No matter how he looked at it, Will undoubtedly wanted to get closer to him. This conclusion was fairly easy to reach. The more complicated question did not have such a simple answer; _what_ did Will see in him? Nico's life was a mess and his appearance reflected it. Just looking in the mirror was enough to bring _his_ spirits down—what did it do to those that looked at him?

But, strangely enough, Will never looked at him like everyone else did. Will didn't avert his eyes hastily and walk the other direction. Will seemed to look past the dark circles under his eyes and the tangled hair that was perpetually unruly. He looked past his eyes, like he was seeing some kind of light inside Nico that was invisible to the rest of the world.

His pocket buzzed and Nico fished out his cell phone, the screen bright with a notification. Jason was calling him.

With a sigh of resignation Nico pressed the phone to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's me, Jason."

"I know who it is, I have your number in my contacts," said Nico wryly, never breaking his brisk pace.

"Oh…right," said Jason. There was a pause, and Nico hoped that Jason wasn't about to hang up on him.

Nico opened his mouth to speak when Jason's voice came back to him.

"Look, I'm going to do a little Christmas shopping and I want your help."

"You want _my_ help?" said Nico incredulously.

Jason laughed, the noise sounding strange through the phone.

"Yes, I want your help," said Jason. "I need to get Piper something nice and I have no ideas."

Nico took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, creating a misty cloud in front of him.

"I think you called the wrong person," said Nico seriously.

"Nico, stop being stupid. Just meet me at the mall in half an hour. I'm going to hang up before you say no. Be there!"

The line went dead and Nico pulled the phone away from his ear to look at the screen in surprise. Jason really had hung up on him. That was a first.

Nico swore under his breath but began his trek to the mall nonetheless.

The mall was bustling with people, which immediately made Nico's skin prickle. He had always preferred solitude and tried to avoid large groups of people whenever he could.

He wove through the crowd, muttering apologies here and there when he accidentally bumped into someone.

At last he spotted Jason up ahead. His blond hair was partially covered in a dark gray beanie and he wore a large jacket and sweater. He spotted Nico and waved enthusiastically.

"You're late," said Jason, his voice tinged with feigned annoyance.

"Cut me some slack, I was halfway across town when you called," said Nico, sticking his hands in the pockets of his coat.

"It was a joke," said Jason, ruffling Nico's hair affectionately. Nico shot him a murderous glare but said nothing.

"Nico, lighten up," said Jason, taking Nico by the arm and dragging him into a brightly lit department store.

Nico rolled his eyes. "Did you really want me to help you pick out a present for your girlfriend?" he asked, glancing up at Jason.

Jason had stopped at a rack of dresses and started thumbing through them.

"Kind of," he said, not looking at Nico.

"What do you mean _kind 'of'?_ " said Nico, his voice taking on a dangerous tone.

Jason looked at Nico, pausing his search through the dresses.

"Well, I _do_ need help, but that's not the only reason why I wanted to see you," he said, somewhat hesitantly.

Nico crossed his arms, waiting.

Finally, Jason turned to face him. An excited smile had spread across his face, one that Nico knew meant no good. Jason leaned forward a little and when he spoke, his voice was low.

"You're with Will Solace now, huh?"

Nico felt his cheeks bloom crimson and he turned on his heel, marching away.

"Wait! Nico—come back!"

Nico was already halfway across the department store when Jason grabbed the back of his jacket with enough force to make him stumble.

"Let go of me!" hissed Nico, terribly aware that his expression gave away far too much.

"Only if you promise not to run away," said Jason seriously.

Nico struggled for a moment longer, cursing Jason and his grip-strength.

"Fine," he snapped, whirling around to face the older boy. "Would you like to explain why you just said that?" he added, his heart beating wildly.

Jason looked startled by Nico's reaction. "Well, you two were talking and then you went back to his apartment…"

A rush of sound filled Nico's ears and it was all he could do to not strangle Jason in the middle of the store. Already they were starting to attract more than a few curious glances from the other shoppers.

"How did you know about that?" he demanded, for once staring right into Jason's eyes.

Jason took a hesitant step away. He obviously hadn't anticipated Nico's reaction.

"Well, I was at the hospital getting some bloodwork done, and when I came out I saw you and Will together."

Nico pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes for a moment, forcing deep breaths into his lungs.

"And how do you know Will?" he asked, his voice a bit more even now.

At this Jason laughed a little. "Believe it or not but we were in the same book club—"

Nico held up a hand to silence him, his head still spinning. Jason ignored him and kept talking.

"So…you two are together? I've gotta say, I never would have expected it, but I'm a strong believer in the whole 'opposites attract' philosophy. In a totally heterosexual way I—"

"Shut. Up." said Nico. His voice was dangerously quiet.

"—I mean if I was going to date another guy I feel like I'd go more for personality, but again, in a totally heterosexual way, he's pretty attractive. Like, he's got really good bone structure in his face, you know? And—"

"SHUT UP."

The store went silent. Everyone paused their shopping and stared at the two of them. They must look so strange together, thought Nico fleetingly. The tall blond hero-type and small delinquent-looking kid with fire in his eyes.

Nico rubbed a hand across his face, wishing he was far away from here.

Slowly the shoppers lost interest and went back to perusing the products. Jason was silent for once, as if just now he had realized that he'd made a mistake.

"Will and I are not together," said Nico the words sticking in his throat. "We just met. We were just hanging out."

"Oh," said Jason softly. " _Oh_."

"Have fun picking out a present for your stupid girlfriend _alone_ ," said Nico, his words razor-sharp.

He turned and started walking away, half of him hoping that Jason would chase after him and apologize, half of him—the half propelled by anger and denial—fiercely proud of the look he had put on Jason's face. He knew it was only a matter of time until this feeling wore off and the guilt crept in, but until then the darkness inside him howled with glee.


	9. Chapter 9

Late that night Nico sat on the edge of his bed, his cell phone balanced carefully on his knee. The screen was easily the brightest thing in the room, casting a small crescent of light through the dim space. An alert occupied the screen, cheerily announcing incoming texts from Jason and Will respectively.

He had been sitting in this position for at least an hour, still as marble. He kept seeing Will and Jason behind his eyelids—both of their faces, flickering back and forth until he was dizzy. Within the space of a few weeks he had managed to push his only friend away and somehow tie himself closer to an otherwise complete stranger.

All of it was his fault. His conversation with Jason had made him realize just how bad he truly was. He could've just corrected Jason about Will. Instead he had lost control. Just like he had back in that coffee shop when those girls had mistaken him and Jason for a couple.

Nico let himself fall back against the comforter, his arms spread out across the bed. While a strange and foreign part of him desperately wanted to see Will again, he knew that leading him on would be a mistake. After all, getting to know someone wasn't one-sided. Eventually Will would ask questions and Nico would have no choice but to relinquish his ugly dark secrets. And though he was unsure about a lot of things, he knew that Will was the last person he wanted to drag into the quagmire of his past.

The cell phone buzzed again. Without looking Nico grabbed it and held it up to his face, the brightness of the screen making him wince.

 _New message: Will Solace_

 _New message: Jason Grace_

Nico rolled his thumb over the screen, unconsciously deciding to read the text from Jason first.

 _Hey man. You've seriously got to stop running away from me. I screwed up, okay? I jumped to a conclusion and it was the wrong one. If it means anything, I was really happy thinking what I thought, because it meant that you might finally be happy. I hope you don't hate me. That'd be lame. Text me back ASAP._

Nico read the text twice, a heavy feeling settling in his gut. How could Jason still want to talk to him? Any reasonable person would have ditched him long ago. Nico had been sure that Jason would finally give up trying to be his friend. But apparently, that was not the case.

He paused for a second, wondering what the message from Will would say.

 _Hi Nico. It's me, Will. I hope this is the right number and you're not someone else reading this. But if you're not Nico, hello! You're probably confused._

Nico had to stop reading for a moment to roll his eyes, though not out of disgust. He could practically hear Will's voice in his head as he read the message.

 _Anyway, I just wanted to say that I had a lot of fun when we hung out the other day. Hopefully you feel the same way or this is going to be really awkward ha ha. There's an outdoor ice skating rink near the university and I was wondering if you wanted to go this Saturday? If not that's totally cool. But it would be nice if you did want to go._

The weight in Nico's stomach lifted ever so slightly. This was the first time someone had tried to befriend him since he had left America two years ago. How he had managed not to scare Will away, he wasn't sure. But he couldn't deny the happiness he felt at the prospect of spending more time with Will.

Slowly, hesitantly, Nico began to type a response, his fingers wavering after every few words.

 _Yes you have the right number. This is Nico. Ice skating sounds fun. What time?_

He read the short text over and over, searching for possible errors. It was concise and straight to the point, very unlike Will's message. He hadn't gone ice skating since he was a kid, but he remembered the experience involving a lot of falling and embarrassment. However, he couldn't bring himself to turn down Will's offer. He had considered saying that ice skating sounded dreadful, but he had a feeling that Will might not get the intended sarcasm.

After a moment of hesitation longer he pressed send, hoping that Will wouldn't dissect his words too much. He sighed, wondering when a simple text had started to mean so much.

He couldn't bring himself to answer Jason's text. He read the message once more before turning his phone off, plunging the room into darkness. Nico vowed to answer it in the morning.

With that he rolled onto his side and let his eyes fall closed, utterly exhausted.


	10. Chapter 10

Saturday came a bit too quickly for Nico's taste. He still wasn't sure how he felt about hanging out with Will again; on one hand, he was excited for what would undoubtedly be a fun outing. But on the other hand, there would be plenty of opportunities for him to make a fool out of himself. What if he tripped Will by accident on the ice? What if he couldn't think of something interesting to say and Will realized how lame he actually was? What if…?

This spiral of negative thoughts continued through Friday night, consequently depriving him of the little sleep that he tried to get each night. When he looked into the mirror on Saturday morning the circles beneath his eyes were a bit darker than usual, making him look like even more of a drug-addict than before.

With a sigh of defeat Nico turned away from the mirror and headed out of his apartment, the brisk winter air hitting him like a slap to the face. Tiny flecks of snow drifted from the sky, landing in his hair and on his jacket. Nico hoped the snow didn't look like dandruff against the darkness of his hair.

What was wrong with him? During the two years he had been traveling he hadn't once given his appearance any thought. He had gone for days without showering, sometimes sleeping in barns or forests at night. It had never bothered him before. But now?

The ice skating rink had begun to fade into focus, creeping closer with every step. A twist of anxiousness flashed through him and his pace slowed momentarily. Why was he doing this? This was a mistake. Will would be so much better off without him—

"Nico!"

Nico turned around, one foot forward in preparation to begin the journey home and avoid a potentially embarrassing situation.

"Hey Nico! Nico DiAngelo!"

Hesitantly, Nico turned, just in time to see Will weaving through the throngs of people crowded around the rink. He was wearing a ridiculous knitted sweater patterned with reindeer and an equally ridiculous grin on his face.

Will stopped before Nico, looking down on him with enough light in his blue eyes to make the anxious weight in Nico's stomach diminish slightly.

"Hi," said Nico, trying to keep his voice even.

"I thought that you wouldn't come," said Will, a bit out of breath from hurrying through the crowd. His cheeks were rosy from the cold. "Which was stupid of me, obviously."

"Yeah," murmured Nico, shifting on his feet nervously.

"We should get in line. There's a surprising amount of people here."

Will began walking back toward the rink and Nico fell into step beside him. _Too late to turn back now_ , he thought fleetingly.

"Were you expecting there to be less people?" asked Nico after a pause, figuring that a normal person would probably keep the conversation going.

Will shrugged and glanced at Nico, his smile a bit lopsided.

"I was _hoping_ there wouldn't be anyone here," he said, nudging Nico with his elbow.

Nico stared at him blankly, wondering what he was missing.

They reached the line and picked out their skates. Nico slipped his on, immediately noticing that the skates were significantly less comfortable than his well-worn combat boots.

"Ready to skate up a storm?" said Will, glancing up at him as he laced up his own skates. His blond hair fell over his eyes in soft waves.

"I guess," said Nico noncommittally, trying to hide his nervousness. He hadn't skated in years. Hopefully he still remembered how so he didn't make a _complete_ fool of himself right away.

They joined the group of people waiting to go onto the ice, Nico trying not to stumble in his skates.

"Isn't it weird how we can walk in these on normal ground?" said Will, turning in a complete circle to emphasize his point.

Nico found the corners of his mouth creeping upward ever so slightly as he watched Will. A few other people were giving him strange looks, but Will didn't seem to notice. Or if he did notice, he didn't seem to care.

They reached the front of the line, the smooth white expanse of ice stretching out in front of them.

"I should probably tell you now, I don't know how to ice skate," said Will, leaning down and speaking into Nico's ear.

Nico looked at him incredulously as the attendant signaled them forward.

"You are kidding, right?" said Nico. The mischievous grin on Will's face told him the answer.

Nico went first, taking a few tentative steps onto the ice. To his delight he remained standing. He wobbled slightly for a few seconds before regaining his balance. He turned to face Will.

The other boy put one foot on the ice.

"I'm doing it!" he yelled triumphantly.

It was then that he put his other foot on the ice and promptly lost his balance. He flailed for a moment, his arms spinning frantically. Nico made no move to help him, but merely stayed stationary. He couldn't tear his eyes away, in the same kind of horrified fascination that one might have while witnessing a train crash.

Then, Will fell forward, sliding forward onto his stomach.

"Wow, you really weren't kidding," said Nico, skating over so he stood right over Will.

Will lifted his head, a sheepish smile on his face as he pushed himself into sitting position.

"A little help?" he said, holding out his hand.

Nico took his hand, stumbling a little as he pulled Will to his feet. For a moment he was terrified that they would both fall. But then Will put an arm around Nico's shoulders and they remained upright.

"Phew, that was close," said Will, panting a little.

Will's arm around his shoulders was surprisingly welcome, considering that Nico had a strict no-touching rule with everyone he met. He could feel the warmth of him through the thick material of his reindeer sweater.

"I guess we're just going to have to skate like this," said Will, laughing his musical laugh.

"Seriously?" said Nico, though his tone was that of amusement and not frustration. "Well, I have to warn you—I'm a speed demon."

With that he took off, pushing off the ice with enough force that Will's arm slipped from around his shoulders. Instead, Will grabbed his arm and Nico pulled him along.

It wasn't long before they had picked up enough speed to rocket around the rink at a dangerous pace. Nico knew he should slow down, but Will was howling in delight like a child loosed in a candy store and his heart pulsed steadily, encouraging him. The other ice skaters were forced to scurry out of their way or face being run over.

Nico was having so much fun that he almost didn't notice Will's grip tighten on his arm.

"Look out!" he yelled.

A small child sat directly in their path, oblivious to the oncoming skaters. Nico veered quickly to the side, losing his balance in the process. Will slammed into him and they went flying, both of them skidding over the ice.

Nico lay still for a moment before regaining his senses. Will lay half across him, his weight pinning him to the hard ice.

"That was close," said Will, pushing himself off of Nico. Nico sat up as well, his head spinning.

Will stood up first and brushed the ice off of his clothes. He held out his hand and Nico took it, letting Will pull him to his feet.

"We probably shouldn't go so fast next time," said Will, a smile still plastered on his face despite the fact that they had both just face-planted in a public skating rink.

"You think?" said Nico, only a hint of his usual sarcasm filtering through his words. He realized with a start that he was still holding Will's hand and let go of it quickly, the tips of his ears turning red. He looked away hastily, hoping that his face didn't give anything away.

He could feel Will's gaze on him but he refused to look at him. Instead, he sped away, easily gliding across the ice.

"Catch me if you can!" he yelled over his shoulder. He heard Will swear under his breath.

Nico turned back to look. Will looked like a newborn deer with ice skates; his arms and legs were spread wide and he moved slowly, awkwardly.

"A little help here?" he asked, holding out his arms.

Nico rolled his eyes but skated back to him nonetheless. Before long they were flying across the ice once more, this time on the lookout for stray children.

In the end, they got kicked out of the ice skating rink. Something about "disturbing the public peace" and them being "menaces to the system." Nico didn't really mind. For once he had been racing forward without trying to flee from anything. When he and Will parted ways at the end of the day, Nico couldn't help but feel a rush of warmth towards this boy he had just met. It had been a long time since he had felt joy pulsing through his veins, and an even longer time since he had held someone's hand.


	11. Chapter 11

When Nico got home later that day, he couldn't get rid of the strange feeling inside him. He felt…well, it was difficult to put in words exactly how he felt. It was almost as if he had drunk a fizzy beverage and the bubbles were spreading through him, making each step lighter. While the memories still clung to him, they were no longer threatening to drown him. Instead of flashbacks to that terrible moment when everything changed, he kept seeing Will's face hovering just behind his eyelids. Warm, bright Will.

And despite the knowledge that Will would be better off without him, Nico couldn't bring himself to push Will away like he did with everyone else. Not when Will looked at him with a kindness in his eyes that wasn't tainted with pity.

In the meantime, Christmas was quickly approaching. In his other life Nico had thoroughly enjoyed the holiday, but now, not so much. He couldn't go anywhere without being plagued by carols and the twinkling lights strung everywhere were beginning to get on his nerves. He couldn't wait for it to be over so everything could go back to normal.

Nico wanted to see Will again. It had been a week since they had gone ice skating, and Nico hadn't heard a word from him. Before they had gone their separate ways, Will had told him that he had had a great time. Nico had said the same, but without the beaming smile that Will had given him. And then, he was gone.

Will hadn't texted Nico since, and while the logical part of Nico knew that he was a person and had his own life, he began to wonder if Will simply didn't want to hang out with him again. He knew he was being ridiculous, but his mind, as he well knew, had an agenda of its own. It began to wander down that dark path that it always did when he was given too much time to think. Maybe Will had invited him to go skating out of pity? Nico kept himself up at night thinking these kinds of thoughts.

Finally, Will texted him. Nico felt an uncharacteristic jolt of happiness when he saw the screen of his cell phone lit up with Will's name, but it was short-lived.

 _Hey Nico! It's me, Will. I mean, you already know it's me because I texted you before and you probably have my number in your contacts. But anyway. I just wanted to say that I've never gotten kicked out of an ice skating rink before, and that was pretty exciting. We should hang out again sometime. I'm going to be out of town until after Christmas, but we could get together after that._

Nico replied shortly after. Unlike Will, his texts were short and direct (that's what texting was for, right?). While he wanted to say that he was disappointed that Will would be gone, he couldn't bring himself to write that. No matter which words he used, the message sounded stupid.

The holidays came and went. Nico spent Christmas Eve wandering the streets of London, trying not to feel lonely as he listened to the sounds of celebration all around him. He walked until the early hours of Christmas day, when the pale sky began to turn pink and excited voices filled the air. Jason sent him a text reading _Merry Christmas!_ which he ignored. He had found that ignoring the holiday to the best of his ability helped ease the lingering sadness that often accompanied him.

Vaguely, he wondered what Will was doing. Was he sitting beside a Christmas tree, surrounded by piles of wrinkled wrapping paper? Drinking a cup of hot chocolate while his family sat around him, happily opening their gifts?

December 26th was a relief. Nothing could have made Nico happier than seeing discarded Christmas trees in the trash, the needles limp and beginning to turn brown.

With that out of the way, the beginning of term seemed closer than ever. All of a sudden it seemed more real, him going to college. The prospect was daunting, but it was also exhilarating. He couldn't wait to get back onto campus, this time weaving back and forth to classes instead of idly wandering about to pass the time.

And with the closeness of term, a weight of anxiety began to sink onto Nico's shoulders. He knew that he was his own worst enemy, but it was difficult to face the thoughts drifting relentlessly through his head, telling him he wasn't good enough. But worse than these thoughts was the real, tangible issue looming on the horizon.

The money is his bank account had been low for some time now. He had tried to be as careful as he could, but he had known in the back of his mind that eventually the money would run out. Unfortunately, he hadn't given any thought to what he would do when that inevitably happened. But now, with a bank receipt in his hand, he knew that he needed to find some source of income. He didn't even have enough money for a plane ride back to America—like he would go back in the first place. And though he hated his dingy apartment, he definitely didn't want to get kicked out of it for not being able to pay the rent.

With this bleak prospect in mind, he set off to find a job. It couldn't be that difficult, could it? Surely there was some place that would hire him?

He began the day trudging through central London, peering through the windows of every business in search of a _Help Wanted_ sign. This proved unsuccessful.

As the weak, watery sunlight began to fade, Nico had travelled miles, still without any luck. He allowed himself five minutes to rest, in which he sat on a grimy bench and ate a bag of chips. His stomach growled with hunger, but he didn't allow himself to eat. Not until he found a job. If he didn't, he'd have to get used to being hungry.

Nico pressed a hand against his forehead, his fingers freezing cold against his skin. He stared at the ground, trying to see every tiny detail in the cracked cement. It was a trick his mother had taught him; if you were ever feeling hopeless, focus on the miniature world existing alongside your own. The point was to realize that, while tiny and otherwise insignificant, this life continued. Nico eyed a delicate sprout peeking out between the cracks of the sidewalk.

With a sigh of frustration he picked up one combat-boot clad foot and stomped it down on the sprout. He had never really liked those kinds of retrospective things. A waste of time, he thought.

His stomach gave a forlorn groan and he refrained from telling it to shut up. Now that his mood was spoiled, it was clear that he was falling into one of his crummy patches, where everything irritated him in some way and his sarcasm was almost uncontrollable.

He glanced up, trying to familiarize himself with his surroundings. He had drifted for a while, not really paying attention to where he was. There was a dim café nearby, and a fountain that had long been dry. Where was he?

Nico pushed himself to his feet and took a few steps forward. His feet ached, but he wasn't going to let that stop him.

It was then that he noticed a small business squished between two buildings. There was a tattered awning over the front door, right below a burned-out neon sign that read _Ghost Town Mortuary_.

With the tiniest smirk resting on Nico's lips he made his way over to the shop. He stood just outside, taking in the dismal building. The walls were made from brick, but they were chipped and worn from the elements. The windows had been covered by black curtains on the inside, so he couldn't see into the store from where he stood.

A normal person would probably have passed this strange shop quickly, without giving it a second glance. But Nico, as he had long known, wasn't exactly a normal person.

He pushed the door open, triggering a bell that sounded more like a strange wail.

Nico blinked several times as his eyes adjusted to the gloom. He fought the urge to laugh—it was as if a Halloween store had exploded. There was a large black desk at the far end of the room draped with faux cobwebs. A fog machine was hidden somewhere, spilling mist over the Styrofoam tombstones placed strategically here and there. Fake skeletons hung from the ceiling. Strange organ music filtered through the air.

Nico picked his way across the room, trying his best not to step on any props. He reached the black desk and peered over it. A Sudoku game rested there, unfinished, accompanied by a can of Sprite. It was a strange sight, given the surroundings.

"Hello?" Nico called, his voice sounding strange.

There was a pause in which Nico looked around idly, wondering how long he should wait until he gave up.

" _Who goes there?"_

Nico turned back to face the desk. Someone had emerged from the shadows. Their footsteps echoed with dull _clunk clunk_ following each step. Nico knew that sound immediately: combat boots.

The person that materialized in front of him wasn't surprising. It was a boy, probably a few years older than Nico. He could be easily described as emo. Black lipstick coated his mouth, along with dark eyeliner around his eyes. His head was partially shaved, the rest dangling long and turquoise to one side. He wore a ripped shirt with a skull on it that looked rather familiar and close-fitting black jeans.

"Um, do you work here?" asked Nico, unfazed by this person in front of him.

"Maybe," said the boy, examining his fingernails.

Nico rolled his eyes. He knew this all too well—the scary dark boy that seemed as if he didn't care about anything. He knew it was all a façade.

Nico stepped forward and put his hands on the desk, leaning closer. He had been walking all day and he was _starving_. He was in no mood to be toyed with.

"Look, I know what you're trying to do," he said, his voice silky. "You're trying to act all intimidating, with your eyeliner and—black lipstick, seriously?"

The boy touched a finger to his lips, looking a bit shocked.

"I will repeat what I said before, and this time, I want an answer. Do you work here?" Nico finished, tilting his head forward ever so slightly, so his messy hair fell in front of his eyes.

The boy looked him up and down, obviously sizing him up. He crossed his arms and gave Nico a look that was—thankfully—thoughtful and not irritated.

"I do, yeah," he said. His accent was a bit Irish. "What do you want?"

Nico willed himself to stay strong. He had made it this far. He couldn't chicken out now.

"I need a job," he said. "And you need some help with the décor. I mean, I know this is a mortuary, but a fog machine? _Really_?"

The boy held up his hands in mock defeat. "Watch it. I hold your fate in my hands as we speak."

Nico resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. "Whatever. Are you hiring or what?"

The boy hesitated slightly, but then spoke, his voice unwavering. "Believe it or not, we are. And you seem like just the person we were looking for."

"So…could I have the job?"

The boy sighed. "I guess. No one else has come by asking about it, so you're the best candidate."

A rush of relief passed through him.

"Well, you don't have a sign or anything," he pointed out.

The boy tilted his head slightly. "Wait, there wasn't a sign in the front window?"

Nico shook his head.

"Bloody hell," said the boy, rubbing a hand over his forehead. "No wonder. I could have sworn that I put up the sign…"

"It doesn't matter now," said Nico hurriedly. "What's the job?"

The boy blinked quickly, looking at Nico as if he were seeing him in a whole new light.

"Secretary. Don't worry. You don't have to touch the bodies or anything. Just take phone calls, occasionally pick up my lunch, banish any wandering spirits, etcetera."

"Sounds lovely," said Nico, his words brittle with sarcasm.

The boy reached for a pad of paper and scribbled a number down.

"Here's the number for the store. You can start tomorrow. My name's Chalice, by the way."

"That's your real name?" questioned Nico, raising a single dark eyebrow.

"What, got a problem with it?" said Chalice, though his voice lacked hostility.

"Not at all," said Nico, picking up the slip of paper and heading for the door. As he turned the doorknob and opened the door he turned to look over his shoulder at the boy who still stood behind the desk. "See you later, Fancy Cup."

 **Please review! It would make my day :) And if you want to check out more snippets and drabbles I've written, you can check out my tumblr (I'm feverfooted there as well).**

 **-Sid**


	12. Chapter 12

Three days before New Year's Eve, Nico received a text from Jason.

 _Hey Nico. Piper and I are having a New Year's Eve party at our apartment. We'd love it if you could come. You can bring someone if you want. The more the merrier!_

Nico's eyes skimmed the text quickly, his brain going to work. Jason, inviting him to a party? A flash of anger rippled through him. The last time Jason had invited him to a party, the consequences had been deadly. An involuntary shiver rushed down his spine, one which he tried to ignore. He knew he was being stupid. There was no way that the same thing would happen this time. There was no way it _could_ happen.

He put the phone in his pocket and almost immediately it buzzed again, signaling a new message. He let out a small sigh of annoyance. Only recently he had started communicating with people via cell phone, and he still hadn't gotten quite used to it.

With a start he saw that it was a message from Will. His annoyance dissipated immediately.

 _Hey Nico. It's me, Will. Dammit I keep forgetting you have my number in your contacts. Of course you know it's me. Anyway. I'm back in town now and I was wondering if you want to do anything for New Year's Eve? Do you already have plans?_

Nico felt a flutter of warmth inside him as he read Will's words. Will, who undoubtedly had tons of friends, wanted to spend time with him on New Year's Eve. Him, of all people.

Nico paused for a second before typing a reply.

 _My friend Jason invited me to a party he's having at his place, but he said I could bring someone. Would you want to go?_

Nico hit send before he could think better of it. He desperately hoped he wasn't making a mistake.

The seconds ticked by and Nico could feel the anxiety creeping over his skin like a layer of frost. _Will probably won't respond any time soon_ , he assured himself. _He's probably busy, doing whatever a normal person does. He's probably—_

This train of thought was halted abruptly when his phone buzzed, bright with a message.

From Will.

 _That sounds like fun! I'd love to go the party with you. Are you talking about Jason Grace, by chance?_

Nico read the text, a wave of relief passing over him. Will hadn't rejected his offer. Phew.

With difficulty, Nico texted Jason to say that he would be coming to his party and that Will would be accompanying him. He could practically see Jason's knowing look and resisted the urge to add _seriously, we're just friends_ , to the end of the message. He knew that that would just make it worse.

Almost immediately Jason responded, saying that he was thrilled that Nico would be going to the party. _It's going to be great, trust me_ , he assured. This message was followed by three winking emoticons, which Nico did his best to ignore.

As New Year's Eve crept closer, Nico couldn't help but start to worry. What if the party was just couples? Maybe that's what Jason had meant when he said that Nico could bring someone. If so, had he just implied that he and Will were a couple? The thought made his face blotchy with crimson. Even worse, what if everyone else at the party brought a date, leaving him and Will to be _together?_

The thoughts made his head spin. He couldn't believe he hadn't considered these things before he had hurriedly invited Will to the party. It wasn't that he didn't like Will; he just didn't know him very well. And to be thrown into a social situation like that…

Nico vowed that from now on, he would put a bit more thought into things like this.

 **HA HA. The next few chapter were my favorite to write ;) What do you think will happen at the party?**

 **-Sid**


	13. Chapter 13

At eight o'clock Nico stood against a lamppost outside Jason's apartment, nerves roiling through his stomach like bubbling acid. He had actually tried a bit to make himself look presentable, which hadn't happened in quite some time. He had bought a new charcoal-gray sweater with his mortuary money and some new dress shoes, which he quite frankly hated. They were stiff and not nearly as comfortable as his battered combat boots. He had even run a comb through his hair, which had been a bit of a struggle. In the end his hair still hung loose and wild around his face, but at least it didn't look like wildlife had been living in it.

With a sigh he leaned against the lamppost. The metal was so cold he could feel it through the thick material of his sweater. Nico shivered and stuffed his hands in his pockets to keep them from going numb. It was _freezing_ out here.

A shadowy figure appeared from around the corner and Nico felt his heart speed up.

 _Oh god oh god oh god…._

The figure came closer and Nico realized that it wasn't Will at all. It was an older man, wearing a scarf and a look of distaste as he eyed Nico.

Nico let out a breath of relief that he hadn't realized he was holding. However, the relief was short-lived.

"Hey there."

Nico felt a hand on his shoulder and he spun around, adrenaline pulsing through him, heart slamming against his ribcage.

For a moment he simply couldn't speak. Will was standing there, the harsh light of the lamppost illuminating his hair, making it gleam silver. The light threw strange shadows across his face, making him seem otherworldly.

Will smiled, his teeth glinting. "I'm sorry if I frightened you," he said, oblivious to the fact that Nico's heart was racing about a mile a minute.

"N-no, you d-didn't," began Nico, cursing himself for stuttering.

"You look nice," said Will kindly, the smile never leaving his face.

Nico wished Will would take a step back. His thoughts were fuzzy, words abandoning him.

"Thanks," he choked out after a pause that seemed to stretch entirely too long. "You do too."

It was true. Will wore a crisp white button-down shirt and a tailored black coat. Nico had never seen him in anything dark colored, and it brought out the gold of his hair and the blue of his eyes. He had also gelled his hair so it was pushed away from his face, making him look sharper around the edges. It was different than he usually dressed, but Nico liked it.

"Shall we go in?" he asked, looking at Nico expectantly.

Nico nodded, grateful for the excuse to step away from the other boy. Immediately he felt his head clear. _What the hell was wrong with him?_

They headed up the stairs to Jason's apartment. Nico could hear the distant reverberation of music as they neared the door.

Nico pressed a thumb against the doorbell, shifting uneasily as they waited. Nico could feel Will's presence almost as if Will was squished against him and hoped that they wouldn't have to resort to small talk. He was truly terrible at small talk.

The door swung open and Jason was there, beaming at the two of them. There was a glass of wine in his hand, threatening to spill as he ushered them in.

"Nico! I'm so glad you could make it!" he said as they stepped into the apartment. "And Will! Wow it's been a while."

"That it has," said Will, giving Jason a hug. Nico noticed absently that Will was even taller than Jason, who was significantly taller than himself.

"So you guys really do know each other," said Nico, more to himself than the other two.

Jason looked over at Nico. "Totally man. Book club bros!"

Will slapped Jason on the back. "Stay ahead of the protagonist, eh?"

Jason burst into laughter at this, the wine in his hand sloshing dangerously. Nico watched them laugh, completely confused.

As Jason and Will talked, Nico took a few steps deeper into the apartment. The front entryway opened up to a high-ceilinged living room where the furniture had been pushed to the sides of the room to allow for more space. There was a considerable amount of people here already, and Nico noticed with a sinking feeling that it seemed to be mainly couples. He could tell immediately by the way they stood, leaning into each other, as if no one else was there. Ugh.

"Hey Nico! I want you to meet someone."

Nico turned back towards Jason to see that a girl had joined the small group. She stood next to Jason, a hand resting on his arm. Nico had never considered himself a good candidate for determining feminine beauty, but he knew immediately that she was beautiful. Her hair hung in loose curls around her face, several brightly colored feathers woven in here and there. Her eyes were mesmerizing—it was impossible to tell what color they were.

"Nico, this is Piper," said Jason, his grin conveying just how much he loved her. Nico deliberately looked away from Jason—raw emotions like that had always made him uncomfortable. Instead he looked at Piper.

"Nice to meet you," said Nico politely. "Jason talks about you a lot."

Piper cast a sideways glance at Jason. "Oh really?"

Her voice was smooth and laced with an accent that Nico couldn't quite identify.

"Only good things," Jason assured her, smiling down at his girlfriend with a sappy look in his eyes. Nico forced down the urge to gag.

"Well, I'm really happy to finally meet you," said Piper, addressing Nico. "Jason speaks most highly of you."

It was Nico's turn to shoot a questioning glance at Jason. Jason shrugged and looked away.

"And…you must be Will," said Piper. Will smiled and nodded.

"Yes, that's me," he said. "I'm glad I could make it to the party! Usually I just watch TV with my parents on New Year's," he added.

Nico was surprised by this. For some reason he had assumed that this party would be a step down from whatever Will usually did.

Jason was giving him a look that Nico didn't really want to decipher.

"Is anyone else from the book club here?" said Will excitedly. He looked a bit like an energetic puppy.

Jason nodded as he sipped from his wineglass. "Yeah, actually. Leo and Frank are here."

He pointed over to where two boys were talking to each other. One was gesturing wildly, threatening to knock over the bookshelf close by.

"Let's go say hi!" said Will, looking at Nico as if asking for permission. Nico shrugged and Will pulled him over to where the boys stood. Nico felt as if his arm were going to be ripped out of its socket. Will didn't look it, but he was _strong_.

"Will!" said one of the boys. He was tall and broad shouldered, his features distinctly Asian.

The other boy turned and his face split into a grin. His hair was curly and his smile was somewhat mischievous.

"Long time no see," said the curly-haired boy. "Who's this?"

Will put his arm around Nico's shoulders, which startled Nico, though he did nothing to move away.

"This is Nico," said Will, squeezing Nico to his side. Nico felt as if his lungs were being compressed.

"Nice," said the other boy, giving Will a fist-bump. "I'm Frank, by the way."

"And I'm Leo," added the curly-haired boy quickly.

"Gotta stay ahead of the protagonist, eh?" said Frank, mirth in his eyes.

Will and Leo burst into laughter at this. Nico, still pinned against him, could feel his ribs moving as he laughed. All he could think was _what the hell is happening here?_

The next hour passed in a blur. Nico wasn't exactly sure what happened, but Will tugged him around the room, introducing himself and Nico together, as if they were part of a package deal. Nico, though a bit bemused, didn't mind much. Will did most of the talking, allowing him to relax a little. At some point Jason pushed a glass of wine into his hand, which he drank quickly. He found that his lingering nerves were soothed a bit by the alcohol.

It was a nice change to spend New Year's with a group of people his age. Everyone seemed pretty cool here, which was a relief. He had been a bit worried that this party would have been like the last he had been to, with drunken dancing and lights that were far too dim and an air of chaos that hung thickly like smoke. Here, bright fairy lights twinkled and everyone was civilized and friendly.

Nico found himself thinking back to last year. At this exact moment a year ago he had been standing in a field in Iceland, utterly and completely alone. It had been cold there too, much colder than it was in London. Why had he gone there in the first place?

It took a moment for him to place the answer. Ah yes. He had gone to see the northern lights.

So he had. He had stood in that frosty field in the middle of nowhere, alone with his thoughts. And as the sky lit up with flares of blues and greens, he had allowed himself to cry. He could remember it all so clearly. The warmth in his eyes, the sting in the back of his throat. He had never taken his eyes away from the sky, and he had never moved to wipe the tears from his cheeks. He had simply allowed himself to stand there and think about everything that had changed, and how much more she would have wanted to be standing in his place.

"I'll be right back," said Will, shaking Nico from his thoughts. "I've got to use the bathroom."

Nico nodded absently, blinking away the memory. He slipped into a small hallway and leaned against the wall, grateful for the chance to recollect himself.

A girl appeared suddenly, leaning up against the wall beside him.

"Hey," she said, folding her arms over her chest.

Nico looked over at her, a bit alarmed to be thrown into a conversation without warning.

"Hello," he began slowly.

She had dark hair the color of raven's feathers, and it hung long and wavy around her face. Her features were regal— olive-colored skin, high cheekbones and full lips covered in dark lipstick. She wore a black party dress and an unzipped hoodie, which seemed like an odd combination.

"I'm Reyna," she said.

"Nico," he said, wondering where this conversation was going.

"No need to be so talkative," she said, a small smile curving her lips.

Nico blinked, not sure what he should say.

"I won't bite, you know," she continued. "You go to that university close by right?"

Nico nodded. "Term hasn't started yet, but yeah, I'm a student there."

"Jason told me you're pretty good at art. Are you majoring in that?" she asked.

"Jason told you that?" he said incredulously. He couldn't remember ever telling Jason about his interest in art. But then again, he had never told him about how he was seeing Will. He needed to remember that Jason was just a massive creep and couldn't mind his own business to save his life.

Reyna bobbed her head, her heavy bangs swaying.

Nico shrugged. "I'm just taking it as an elective for now. But I might end up majoring in it. I haven't really given it a lot of thought."

"I'm taking art as an elective too," said Reyna, which surprised him. She didn't exactly strike him as the artistic type. "We might be in the same class."

Nico found himself liking this girl he had just met, which was unusual. Most of the time it took him months to warm up to people. But there was something about Reyna that said she could be trusted. And besides, she was the only person he had met in London that didn't have a bubbly, outgoing personality. It would be a relief to spend time with someone that didn't act like a hyperactive puppy all the time.

"So…I saw that you brought that male model to the party," said Reyna slowly, her lips still quirked into that small, sideways smile.

"Who?" asked Nico, genuinely confused.

Reyna's dark eyes widened. "Uh, the blond godly type that came in with you?"

Nico cast his mind back and came to the startled conclusion that she was talking about Will.

"Oh, you mean Will?" he asked cautiously. He wasn't sure where she was going with this.

"Are you two dating?" she said, her voice so casual that it took a moment for Nico to realize what she had just asked.

Nico felt the familiar spark of panic (why did everyone keep assuming that he and Will were together?), but for once he willed himself to stay calm. He didn't want another incident. Not when this party was going fairly well.

"No, we aren't," he said, his voice surprisingly even. "We're just friends."

"Ah, alright," said Reyna. "I wasn't going to ask, but I was just too curious. He's definitely into you though."

Nico's eyelids fluttered quickly as his brain processed these unfamiliar words.

"What makes you say that?" he said dazedly.

Reyna rolled her eyes.

"It's obvious, isn't it? He's been introducing the two of you together the whole night—trust me, I've been watching. And you probably haven't noticed, but he's been looking at you like you're some kind of precious gem."

"Well that doesn't mean anything," said Nico quickly. "He always looks at me like that."

Reyna gave him a rough shove to the chest. "Dude! Are you hearing yourself?"

Nico couldn't backpedal quickly enough. "No that's not what I meant. I meant that he's really nice so he looks at everyone like…" he trailed off. The words sounded even weaker coming out of his mouth.

Reyna nodded. "Sure," she said, the word caked with sarcasm.

"Whatever," said Nico with finality, holding up his hands in defeat. "But he definitely—" he lowered his voice to a whisper "—doesn't like me."

Reyna still had that smirk resting on her lips. "Fine, fine. I'll drop it."

Nico exhaled in relief and cast around in his head for a change of topic.

"So, did _you_ bring anyone to the party?" he asked, somewhat timidly.

Reyna laughed, the sound loud and clear.

"No, actually. I'm friends with pretty much everyone here, so that's how I got invited. But no, I'm not dating anyone at the moment. My girlfriend and I broke up about two months ago."

Nico was about to say something else when her words clicked in his head. She had spoken so smoothly that the statement hadn't even registered at first.

"Your girlfriend?" he said, his eyes widening in surprise.

She folded her arms again, regarding him with a steady gaze. As if she were daring him to comment. "Well yeah," she said. "Boys kind of suck."

A small laugh bubbled up inside of Nico, catching him off guard.

"No offense to your sexy companion," she added slyly.

"Does anyone else know that…you know….?" He began hesitantly. He couldn't believe that she could be so open about something that he himself had been hiding for so long.

Reyna looked shocked. "Well, _yeah_ ," she repeated, as if this were the most obvious answer in the world. "What's the point of hiding it? Me dating girls doesn't make me an outcast. My friends are still my friends."

She turned and gestured to the group of college students dancing in the living room.

"Trust me; the people here are the coolest I've ever met. They're totally chill with it. It's the elderly you've got to watch out for."

Nico barely had a second to think this concept over before someone else spoke.

"Oh, there you are," said a voice from farther down the hallway.

Nico turned to see Will walking towards them, appearing strange in the low lighting of the hallway.

"I don't think I've met you yet," said Will as he came to stand beside the two of them. He held out a hand for Reyna to shake. Reyna shook his hand, sending a meaningful look to Nico while she did so.

"I'm Reyna," she said politely.

"And I'm Will," he said, flashing one of his brilliant smiles. "Nice to meet you. Are you friends with Nico?"

"As of three minutes ago, yes," she said.

Will laughed. "Okay then. Any friend of Nico is a friend of mine. What were you guys talking about?"

Nico felt a flush of panic beginning in the pit of his stomach, and he shot a warning look towards Reyna.

"Pest-resistant foliage," said Reyna easily.

Will nodded, looking a bit confused. "Alright then. Do you want to dance?" he asked Nico.

Nico hesitated for a moment. He never danced as a general rule, but Will was looking at him pleadingly, his bright blue eyes clear and eager.

"Uh…" he began.

"Nico would _love_ to dance," said Reyna cheerfully. "Wouldn't you, Nico?"

Nico shot her a murderous glare, which Will somehow missed.

"That's fantastic! Let's go!"

Before he knew it Will was dragging him into the middle of the living room, where most of the partygoers danced jubilantly. Techno music blared from the speakers, making Nico feel jumpy.

To Nico's horror Will began to dance quite…horrendously. It was as if he had embodied every middle-aged white man in Britain. He swung his arms wildly, threatening to decapitate those dancing around him. Nico quickly took a few steps back to protect himself.

"Why aren't you dancing?" yelled Will over the blare of the music. He began to swivel his hips so quickly that Nico nearly got motion sickness.

Nico couldn't have responded if he tried. He was utterly entranced by the disaster that was Will.

And it seemed like he wasn't the only one. Slowly, people were starting to notice his…particular style of dance. They began to mimic him, and soon enough the room was filled with college students dancing like complete idiots.

"Yeah Will!" shouted Jason, who was dancing with Piper nearby.

Will smiled broadly and gave Jason the thumbs-up.

 _Does_ anything _embarrass him?_ wondered Nico, still standing stationary on the dance floor.

It was then that Will darted forward and grabbed Nico's wrists, shaking him back and forth to the beat of the music.

" _Will!_ " hissed Nico indignantly as Will spun him around.

"Just relax," said Will, dipping his head to speak into Nico's ear. Nico could feel his breath ruffle his hair, warm and soft, and an involuntary shiver travelled down his spine. "Let the music move you!"

Nico closed his eyes, taking in deep breaths. The air was tainted with the smell of cologne and perfume and alcohol. He wasn't sure if it was physically possible for him to relax, but he decided to give it a shot.

He opened his eyes and the party reappeared in full force. All around him people danced in close proximity, but all he could see was Will. He was like a beacon in front of him, and Nico couldn't tear his eyes away from the glow he was exuding. Will was beaming down at him, with a light in his eyes that Nico had never seen before. How could he be so close to someone so bright and _pure_ when he himself was nearly drowning in his own darkness?

The music picked up to an even more vigorous pace and Nico was spinning, the room a blur. All he could see were Will's eyes, flickering in and out of focus.

"It's almost midnight guys!" Jason shouted over the music. "Countdown in ten seconds!"

Nico was all too aware of Will getting steadily closer to him. He could feel his heart begin to speed up—or was that just the music?

" _TEN!_ "

Jason's voice, loud and clear.

" _NINE!"_

Everyone else, joining in.

" _EIGHT!"_

Will, his hands on Nico's waist.

Nico blinked, the sensation so strange and unfamiliar that he lost track of time.

 _"FIVE!"_

Nico, his pulse fluttering in his throat.

" _FOUR!"_

Only now beginning to realize what was happening.

" _THREE!"_

Will, so close that Nico could feel the feverishness of his skin.

" _TWO!"_

Nico stumbled slightly, jostled by the other dancers. He was faintly aware of Reyna drifting towards him, as if in slow motion.

" _ONE!"_

Nico looked up to see Will. His bright smile had faded, replaced by a strange look that Nico couldn't interpret. Nico felt himself move forward as if in a trance, taking a step even closer to Will, who was impossibly close already.

The room exploded with a raucous cheer, breaking Nico's trance. Nico looked over to see Jason kissing Piper passionately, and he looked away quickly. Unfortunately, all around him couples were embracing, the music still shatteringly loud.

Nico's eyes met Will's, and for a moment they just looked at each other. Will tilted his head slightly, as if in polite confusion.

It was then that some unseen force barreled into him, knocking him away from Will. Nico was all too aware of someone kissing him—arms wrapped around him tightly, their mouth hot on his.

" _What the hell?!_ "

Nico pulled away to see Reyna there, smiling crookedly. She leaned close and for a moment Nico thought that she would kiss him again—but no, she was just whispering into his ear.

"You owe me one," she said before pulling back and slipping away, disappearing without a trace.

Nico eyes darted to Will who was— _laughing?_

His head was thrown back, his hands clutching his sides. His laugh was nearly hidden in the sound of celebration.

"Why are you laughing?" said Nico furiously.

Will gasped for air, rubbing tears from his eyes.

"Oh my god," he wheezed. "The look on your face! Priceless."

Nico felt a flare of anger and tried to force it down as best as he could. He wasn't completely sure why Reyna had kissed him, but he had a feeling that she must have had a good reason. She was gay anyway—she definitely hadn't done it because she was attracted to him.

"And also, there's lipstick all over your mouth," added Will, still giggling like a child.

Nico scowled at him and ducked out of the living room, heading down the hallway to the bathroom. He slipped inside and locked the door, grateful for the sudden privacy.

He looked into the mirror and winced. There was indeed dark magenta lipstick smeared over his mouth, and he did his best to scrub it off. He looked away.

His head felt heavy, like someone had stuffed it full of cotton balls. He could still hear the music, the bass thumping reassuringly from the other side of the bathroom door. His eyes stung and he realized all at once how tired he was, which was strange. Nico had stayed up much later than this wandering the city by himself. Maybe the constant social interaction was what had drained him. It had been a long time since he had been expected to be sociable for hours on end.

Nico turned on the sink, cupping his hands beneath the faucet. The water pooled between his hands, nearly freezing. The pipes were probably outside, collecting frost. He splashed the water on his face, leaning over the sink, his hands braced on either side.

 _Why had Reyna kissed him?_

Surprisingly, he was more confused than annoyed. He hated PDA—he always had. He believed that something like that should be kept away from the eyes of strangers. And while the kiss should have disgusted and embarrassed him, all he felt was a bizarre sense of curiosity.

He cast his mind back a few minutes. He had been dancing with Will. _Dancing._ With _Will._ The sentence made no sense in his head, let alone in reality.

Will had been getting steadily closer to him, the look on his face slowly morphing to something Nico hadn't been able to interpret.

There had been a moment when Nico was sure something was going to happen. What that something was, he couldn't be sure.

And then Reyna had nearly knocked him over, and the moment had shattered.

 _What had been about to happen?_

Nico lifted his head, looking back into the mirror. His reflection stared back and he was shocked to see that he looked—different. Sure, he had actually attempted to brush his hair for once and the circles beneath his eyes had faded considerably (he had been able to sleep longer lately), but the difference ran deeper than that. There was a glint in his eyes that definitely hadn't been there when he had arrived in London. And the angles of his face didn't look as…severe. The downturn of his lips wasn't as pronounced.

Nico turned away and wiped his hands on his pants, uncertainty flooding him. He had decided to stay in London to get his life back in order. And so far it had been working.

Yet why did he get the feeling that everything was about to slip away from him, farther out of his control than it had ever been?

 **So yeah. That was my favorite chapter to write so far, and I'm sure you can figure out why. If you liked it, or you like the story so far, leave a review! I was honestly really stuck with this story for months but your reviews made me want to continue it. So thanks again! Any ideas on what will happen next?**

 **-Sid**


	14. Chapter 14

Nico spent New Year's Day sleeping.

He couldn't remember the last time he had slept longer than five hours. However, he wasn't complaining.

He had returned from Jason's at around two in the morning. The party had still been raging, but a headache had begun to develop behind Nico's eyes, and he knew it was only a matter of time before he snapped. In the end he had excused himself, wishing Jason a Happy New Year and awkwardly saying goodbye to Will, who had offered to walk him home.

"Are you sure?" asked Will, his eyes wide with concern as Nico slipped on his coat and turned towards the door.

"Yes, Will," said Nico, trying not to sound too exasperated (though at this point, it had been a challenge). "I'll be fine. I can take care of myself."

"Well…alright," Will said, eyebrows furrowed with worry. "Text me, okay?"

"Okay," Nico said. They looked at each other for a tense moment before Nico swung the door open without another word.

Nico had trudged home alone, letting his mind spiral like the tiny pieces of snow drifting through the crisp air.

 _What had been about to happen?_

The question plagued him, burning like a hot coal in his stomach. He had been tempted to text Will and _just ask_ , but he figured it would probably sound stupid.

In the end he had nearly thrown his apartment door open and locked himself inside, as if that could serve as a barricade for the _what ifs_ buzzing through his head. He had barely changed into sleep clothes when a wave of exhaustion more intense than he had ever felt washed over him. He stumbled over to his bed, ramming his foot into the metal bed frame in the process. If he had been more alert it would have hurt terribly. But in his current state it did little to faze him. He collapsed on his bed before he had even gotten a chance to wiggle beneath the covers.

When he woke, milky beams of sunlight were filtering through the dirty window, doing little to brighten the dingy apartment.

He shifted groggily, feeling his heartbeat pounding through his head. Slowly he regained his senses as the heavy blanket of sleep lifted.

Arms shaking a little, he pushed himself into a sitting position. The comforter pooled around his waist and he found himself absently wondering when he had last washed it. The fabric felt a bit stiff to the touch.

Nico yawned and stretched his arms high over his head. He felt both awful and refreshed—it was an odd combination. How long had he been asleep? He guessed it was early morning…

His hands pawed at the mountain of comforter lazily as he tried to find his phone. He knew it was here somewhere.

It took him several moments before his fingers found the smooth texture of his cell phone. He held the screen close to his eyes, his vision still a bit fuzzy.

 _5:36 pm_

Nico blinked quickly, as if that could change the time. Surely that couldn't be right. He never slept longer than five hours. More often than not, he simply stayed up through the night, finding the process of actually falling asleep a bit inconvenient.

There were five unread texts waiting for him. Three from Chalice, the guy who had hired him at the mortuary, one from Jason, and one from…Will.

He read the texts from Chalice first.

 _Where are you?_

 _I thought you were coming to work today? You were supposed to pick up my lunch and dust the skeletons._

 _Seriously Nico, if you don't text me back I'm going to seal you in one of these coffins._

Nico felt a wave of guilt rush through his stomach. He had completely forgotten about his shift at the mortuary. He had foolishly agreed to work New Year's Day ("People don't stop dying on holidays, you idiot," Chalice had said in response to Nico's reluctance.) without considering how he would feel after Jason's party. He hadn't anticipated that he would feel so sluggish. Or that he would promptly sleep for fifteen hours right after and feel like his tongue had condensed into a brick.

 _Sorry about that. I accidentally overslept. I can come over now if you want_ , he typed. The last part was him being polite. He really hoped Chalice wasn't going to make him go to work like this.

A response came almost immediately.

 _You overslept? Blimey, are you a vampire or something? Don't bother coming over now. I'm closing up shop for the night._

Nico sighed in relief and turned his attention to the remaining texts.

 _Happy New Year! I'm glad you came to the party last night!_ From Jason.

 _Happy New Year!_ From Will.

Nico frowned at the small screen of his phone. Usually Will's texts were longer, as if he typed without thinking and didn't bother to edit them afterward.

And even though there was no reason to question this text, Nico had a sinking feeling in his stomach. He got the vibe that Will was mad at him for some reason…

But that was ridiculous. He was thinking too much, as usual.

He hoped, at least.

 **A short chapter, but I hope you liked it! If you have any ideas on what is going to happen next, leave them in a review! Your predictions will be fun to read. Also, if you want to talk about Percy Jackson you can PM me, but I'd prefer to talk on my blog ( feverfooted on tumblr). It would be nice to get to know some of you guys :)**

 **-Sid**


	15. Chapter 15

The next day Nico dressed warmly, in two sweaters and his winter jacket and made his way to work. After a night of little sleep he was back to his usual self, though he did feel slightly more rested than usual.

As he walked to the mortuary, he hoped that Chalice wouldn't scold him. It wasn't so much that Nico would feel bad—it would simply be tedious. Besides, it had been a complete accident, him missing work. Nico still couldn't believe that the party had exhausted him so much. Maybe, after he had become so accustomed to living alone, he had forgotten how much energy it took to interact with other people.

A cheesy recorded sound effect of a ghostly groan sounded as Nico pushed open the door.

"Ah, nice of you to join me," said Chalice, his voice echoing from somewhere deeper in the gloom. "I was wondering if I was going to have to fire you."

"No need for that," said Nico, pulling off his coat as he approached the front desk. Chalice sat there with a smirk on his lips (today fashioning navy-blue lipstick).

"Did you party too hard?" said Chalice.

Nico sent him a withering look and took a seat behind the desk, beside him.

"Oh come on, there's no need to give me the cold shoulder," said Chalice with a roll of his eyes. "How was your New Year's?"

"Fine," said Nico. He didn't particularly want to recall the events of that night, especially not to Chalice.

"Did you get a special new year's eve kiss?" prodded Chalice.

Nico was reminded of Reyna's mouth on his own.

"Uh…you could say that."

Chalice's eyes widened. " _Really_?"

Nico cast him a sideways glance, hoping that his eyes conveyed his irritation.

"Why the tone of surprise?" he demanded.

Chalice shrugged. After a moment of silence he added, "Who was it?"

Nico sighed, grabbing a feather duster from behind the counter and walking over to where a trio of fake skeletons sat as a display.

"Some girl I didn't know," said Nico, running the duster over the skeleton.

"A girl, huh? You didn't strike me as that type of guy."

Nico froze mid-motion. He turned back to look at Chalice.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he said, trying to keep his voice level.

Chalice cleared his throat nervously and took a sudden interest in his black-painted nails.

"Whatever. Forget it," he said.

Nico turned back to the skeleton, trying to ignore its smug smile.

 **Oh Nico...**

 **Btw what do you guys think of Chalice? He was kind of just this random character I created for the sake of the plot, but I think he's pretty cool and I'd like to develop some sort of backstory for him.**

 **-Sid**


	16. Chapter 16

Before he knew it, the first day of term arrived. Nico dressed carefully in the dull light of his apartment, wrapping a thick scarf around his neck and running his fingers through his hair. It wasn't as good as a thorough brushing, but it was better than nothing.

Outside, the clouds had decided to clear for the time being, allowing swatches of brilliant blue to peek through the endless stretch of gray.

Nico made it onto campus easily, his new backpack bouncing between his shoulder blades with every step. The feeling was strange, but somewhat comforting.

The university was buzzing with students, the sidewalks crowded with laughter and conversation. Nico took it all in, still in awe that this was his reality now. He was a student, at a university in London. A few months ago he never would have believed it.

Someone bumped against his shoulder, and Nico turned to mutter an apology. The words stuck in his throat.

"Reyna?" he said in surprise.

She grinned slyly and fell into step beside him. She wore a plum colored sweater and black knitted beanie, her dark hair pulled into a loose braid over one shoulder.

"The one and only," she replied, looping her thumbs under her backpack straps. "You didn't think you'd see me again, did you?"

"I hadn't really given it any thought," said Nico honestly. His mind had been much too scattered lately for him to think much about Reyna, though he was happy to see her again.

"Well, you're not going to get rid of me that easily," she said. "You off to your first class?"

Nico nodded, pulling a scrap of paper out of his pocket. He had written down today's classes so he wouldn't forget. "English Literature."

Reyna smiled wider. "Me too."

Nico felt a surprising wave of relief. Though he wouldn't admit it, he was glad that he knew someone here. He had never been the most social of people, but he also didn't appreciate the constant isolation that he usually endured.

"So, how've you been?" she asked.

Nico shrugged. "Fine, I guess. Not much has been happening."

"Same with me," said Reyna. "Ever since New Year's I've been kind of dead."

"I slept until 5 pm the day after," said Nico.

"I slept until 6," she said with a sideways smile.

Nico felt a strange warmth for this girl he barely knew. Maybe he had finally found someone who felt the same way as he did about social events.

They walked in silence for a moment, navigating the crowds of students together. It was a comfortable silence, not one threaded with awkwardness.

"Have you seen Will since?" she said.

His steps faltered for a moment—only a moment.

"Uh…no," said Nico, trying to keep any emotion out of his voice. After a pause he added, "I think he might be mad at me."

Reyna turned to him in surprise.

"Why do you think that?"

Nico watched his feet.

"I don't know. I just got that vibe."

Reyna's gaze was far away. "If he is mad, it might be my fault."

Nico blinked quickly.

"Why would it be your fault?"

Reyna shrugged and readjusted the straps of her backpack. "Well, I kind of ruined your New Year's kiss, for one thing."

Nico contained the disbelieving sound that caught at the back of his throat—barely.

"I don't think that's why he'd be mad," said Nico, refusing to acknowledge the implications of this sentence. "He wasn't going to…kiss me."

"No?" said Reyna, surprise widening her dark eyes. "He looked like he was going to."

"Were you creeping on us the entire time?" said Nico tiredly, yet a faint smile curved his lips.

"A little." She laughed. Nico liked the sound of it.

They arrived at their classroom—a tall, sprawling building made from weathered stones. He followed Reyna inside and they took their seats in the back of the room. The classroom filled slowly, and surprisingly, no one shot him looks of disgust or horror. For the first time, Nico felt like he was exactly where he was meant to be.

The rest of the day passed in a strange blur. Everything was new, yet surprisingly familiar. Even in a foreign country, school was school. Complete with books, homework, and note taking. It was easy to fall into the rhythm of things. Far easier than it had been in high school back in America, with everyone staring at him or whispering things behind their hands. Here, no one seemed to care that Nico hadn't properly brushed his hair in who knows how long, or that the dark circles under his eyes probably wouldn't ever go away. He was a student, minding his own business, and no one bothered him. It was refreshing.

His last class of the day was art.

As he took his seat in the art studio, he couldn't help but remember the first time he had come into the studio. That was the first time he had seen Will.

Nico turned to look towards the door without thinking, then turned back just as quickly. _What was he doing?_ He tried to convince himself that he hadn't been looking for Will. He barely knew him, for Christ's sake. He couldn't keep doing things like this.

"Oh hello there, stranger."

Warm and bright and splendid, there he was, sliding into the empty seat beside him. Will.

"Hi," said Nico, his heartbeat flickering slightly. "You surprised me."

"Sorry about that," said Will, running a hand through his hair before reaching into his backpack to pull out a battered sketchbook. Nico tried not to stare.

"I didn't know you were going to be in this class." _Lies._

Will glanced up at him and smiled. "I'm full of surprises."

"But…why are you in a beginning art class if you're a junior?" asked Nico, wincing at how blunt the words sounded.

"Because he sucks at art, that's why."

Nico looked over to see Reyna taking the seat opposite him.

"I do _not_ suck at art," Will protested, folding his arms.

"Will, everything you draw looks like it got stuck in a vacuum."

Will made a loud, indignant noise, but before he could retaliate, a middle-aged man stepped to the front of the classroom and began to speak.

"Welcome everyone," he said. "My name is Mr. Brunner, and I'll be your professor for this course."

He had a low, smooth voice. Rumbling slightly, like it had been softened over tumbling stones.

"I don't want to waste any time. Let's do a brief warm-up sketch, shall we? Just to see where we're all at. Turn to the person sitting next to you and sketch them. You have ten minutes."

Nico hesitated, torn between Reyna and Will.

"Sketch the boy," said Reyna. "He needs to see some decent art for a change."

Will pouted but turned toward Nico nonetheless.

"Alright then," said Nico.

"Make me look pretty," said Will, opening his own sketchbook and beginning to sketch enthusiastically.

"If you say so…" said Nico.

It was then that he looked at Will, really, really _looked_ at him, like he did with anything he sketched. He paused for a moment, pencil motionless, as he looked at Will. This close, he could see the freckles dusting the bridge of his nose and cheeks, the creases around his mouth and eyes from smiling. And his eyes…even fixed on the sketchbook they were so incredibly _blue_ , like polished sapphires.

Nico set to work. It had been so long since he'd sat down and drawn anything—fleeing the country didn't leave much time for idle sketches. But it felt good drawing. This, he had forgotten, was his talent.

"Alright, time is up!"

Nico blinked. He hadn't noticed any time passing. This had happened before, back home. He had once gone eight hours without pausing, totally and completely engrossed in his work.

"If I do say so, I did a great job," said Will proudly, turning the sketchbook to face Nico.

Nico blinked.

"That's…me?" he asked.

Reyna began to laugh, the sound filling the hushed classroom.

"What's so funny over here?"

Nico froze. Mr. Brunner had appeared beside them, looking down at them with a rather perturbed glint in his eye.

He plucked the sketchbook from Will's hands and examined it critically.

"Solace, we've talked about this," he said. "You possess no artistic talent whatsoever."

Will seemed to take this in stride, his posture straightening ever so slightly.

"Well, if you don't put forth time and effort you'll never get better, right?" he said cheerfully, obviously unaffected by Mr. Brunner's rigid demeanor.

"Son, you've been in my class for three years now," he said tiredly. "You're not getting any better."

Behind him, Reyna seemed to be choking on stifled laughter.

"With all due respect, Mr. Brunner, you'll just have to get used to my terrible art," said Will. "I'm not going anywhere."

"I suppose," said Mr. Brunner, though he smiled, ever so slightly. "Now, what do you have there?"

Before Nico could react, Mr. Brunner took the sketchbook from his hands. Nico felt a thrill of unease prickle down his spine. He hated watching people look at his art. Always had.

"Boy…this is phenomenal," breathed Mr. Brunner. "You did this in ten minutes?"

"Yes, sir," said Nico quietly.

Will strained forward to see it as well. Will gasped gently.

"Nico!" he exclaimed. "You never told me you could draw like that!"

Nico, being the modest soul that he was, never striving for praise, shrugged.

"But why did you make Mr. Solace's freckles look like stars?"

Nico blinked. He felt, all too clearly, Will's eyes, wide and vibrant, on his.

"Uh…I don't know," he mumbled.

"Artistic interpretation!" said Mr. Brunner loudly. "You may just be the best artist to come through my studio in a long time."

 **! Any predictions?**

 **PS: thanks for reading my story! It makes me really happy ^-^**


	17. Chapter 17

When class ended, Nico felt a strange blossom of triumph taking root in his chest. No one had ever complimented his art like that, especially not an art professor.

He gathered his things, very aware of Will beside him. Will had been quiet throughout the rest of the class, but he didn't seem angry (at least, Nico hoped he wasn't angry). It was much too difficult trying to decode Will's emotions.

"I don't think he's angry at you," Reyna whispered into Nico's ear as she stood, throwing her backpack over her shoulder, warmth in her dark eyes. Then, she left.

That left Nico alone with Will. He wanted to say something to him, but words were failing him once again.

They left the classroom walking side by side. Will's strides were longer, so Nico had to walk faster to keep up. He stopped a little ways away from the art studio.

"That drawing was really, really good, Nico," he said, after a lengthy pause. His voice was filled with awe. "Seriously, I didn't realize you were so good."

Nico shrugged. "It's no big deal—"

"Don't say that," said Will, sounding a bit irritated for the first time. "You've got a gift, and I don't want you to try and convince me otherwise."

It was then that Will did something that caught Nico completely off guard—he grabbed Nico and pulled him into a hug.

Nico tensed for a moment, confused as to how this had happened. But he didn't mind. Not really. For the most part he tried to avoid physical contact with other people, but this was…different. A welcome different. And Will was so warm. He was so tall that his chin rested atop Nico's head.

"Sorry," said Will, pulling away and ruffling his wavy hair, looking a bit embarrassed. "It's just…I think you're really cool."

Nico blinked, meeting Will's wide, blue eyes. The faintest blush painted his cheeks like rose watercolor. He had completely lost track of what was happening. One moment Will was _hugging_ him, and now he was telling him he was cool?

"Uh…thanks," said Nico, hoping he didn't sound as awkward as he imagined.

"One question though…why did you draw my freckles like stars?"

Nico fiddled with his sleeve nervously. Why _had_ he drawn his freckles like that? Truthfully, it was because that's how he saw them. A universe of tiny constellations spanning Will's cheeks.

"I don't know," he said instead. "That's kind of how they looked to me."

Will smiled brilliantly, like this answer was the most precious thing he had ever heard. Why did Will treat his words like they were gemstones? Nico didn't understand. Regardless, he liked this bright boy. And for what it was worth, Will seemed to like him too.

At the moment, Nico didn't question it.

 **Will and Nico make me so happy you don't understand.**

 **-Sid**


	18. Chapter 18

The next month passed in a blur—a happy blur, tinged in laughter and smiles and sarcastic comments and iron skies. Nico had never felt so at ease before. Four days a week he went to work at the mortuary, and the rest of the week he attended classes. He got to know Reyna quite well. Reyna, as it turned out, seemed to be the female equivalent of himself, and they enjoyed quite some time together.

And as for Will…

Nico began to realize that he was falling for him.

It happened all at once. The realization that he liked him. Really, truly liked him, in a way much deeper than friendship. It had been coming on for a while, he supposed, but it hit him like a speeding truck when he finally realized it.

And once he realized it, that's all he could think about.

They hung out almost every day now, poking around old bookstores or trying to find the most out-of-the-way cafes. Nico had been over to Will's apartment several more times now, each time significantly less awkward than the first. It was easy now, talking to him, laughing with him. There was no way it should have worked—their friendship, that is—but somehow, it did.

Nico wasn't complaining.

Sometimes, when they looked at each other, Will's eyebrows quirking upward at an unspoken joke that they both understood, Nico thought that maybe— _maybe_ Will felt the same way. But he was much too afraid to ask him.

He didn't want to risk _this—_ whatever it was they had. Because every moment Nico spent with Will, he felt his own darkness ease ever so slightly. As if there was hope for him after all.

He couldn't compromise this. He couldn't.

He didn't want to be miserable again.


	19. Chapter 19

As the days passed and the weather continued to worsen, sometimes leading to days on end of icy rain. Nico didn't much like the rain—it disrupted his nightly walking patterns. But now that he had Will, he wasn't doing much walking. He didn't mind. Will kept him grounded, kept him in place.

Nico liked having a place to stay.

It was on one of these evenings that Nico found himself in Will's apartment, laying sprawled across his couch. A fire crackled merrily in the fireplace, casting a glow of warmth towards him. Will was off in the kitchen, making something or other. Nico could hear the clinking of dishes from his place in the living room.

Nico simply stared upward at the ceiling, letting himself relax. His shoes were off, his combat boots sitting next to the door besides Will's bright yellow hi-tops. It was a funny combination.

Nico glanced over the top of the couch towards the kitchen. He could see Will, intent on whatever he was making, a checkered apron around his waist. God, he was adorable.

Nico felt a thrill in the pit of his stomach. He had never liked anyone like this before. The last person he had had a crush on…

A swirl of dark memories rushed back, and Nico forcibly pushed them away. He couldn't think about that night. Not now. Not when everything was otherwise okay.

"Alright, it's ready!"

Nico pushed himself into a sitting position, trying to wipe his face of anything that might give him away.

 _He's your friend_ , Nico scolded himself inwardly. _Don't screw this up because you have a crush on him._

Will emerged from the kitchen holding a tray with two bowls on it. Tendrils of steam wafted upwards from their contents.

Will sat the tray down on the coffee table before handing Nico one of the bowls and a spoon. Nico peered inside to see what resembled chicken noodle soup.

"I made it for you," said Will, smiling up at Nico.

Nico smiled as well, taking a sip. It didn't taste like anything special, but Nico felt a stroke of warmth anyway.

"Thanks," said Nico. "It's delicious."

This seemed to make Will happy. They ate in silence, the only sound the crackling fire.

When they finished, the sat side by side on the couch, rather closer than Nico was used to. He was all too conscious of his heartbeat thudding through his veins. He hoped Will couldn't hear it.

Will cleared his throat.

"Um…Nico?"

"Yeah?"

"Could I ask you something?" Will's voice was quieter than usual. Timid, even.

"Of course."

Will opened his mouth to speak, but his words were cut off by a loud chirping sound.

Will swore under his breath and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

"I'm sorry, I have to take this. It's my old roommate."

Will lifted himself off the couch a left the room, the phone held to his ear.

Nico felt his stomach sink with disappointment, but managed to convince himself that Will hadn't been about to ask him anything important.

Still…

Will returned soon enough, a frown on his lips.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

Will shook his head. "No, just my roommate. He's coming back from Australia for a few weeks."

"And that's…bad?" said Nico, confused.

"Yes," said Will shortly, taking a seat next to Nico once more, close enough that their legs touched.

A pause stretched between them, punctuated by the fire and the rain outside, pit-pattering against the window panes.

"Nico."

Will said it slowly, as if weighing it on his tongue, testing it out. The tone of his voice made Nico's blood turn to ice.

He was looking at him, his face half-shadowed by the fire. His eyes, usually so blue, danced with the movement of the flames. There was a strange look on his face. And then, tentatively, he stretched out a hand, placing it gently on Nico's neck.

Nico kept his eyes locked on Will's, overwhelmingly conscious of everything—his breath, coming in harsh bursts, his stomach, knotted in skeletal butterflies. Will's fingers, creeping upward into his hair. He suddenly wished that he had thought to brush it. The thought was so ridiculous that he almost laughed—almost.

"Is this okay?" said Will quietly, continuing to twist his fingers into Nico's hair.

Nico nodded, still watching Will's face carefully. For what felt like the millionth time, it seemed impossible to pinpoint exactly what he was thinking.

And then, ever so slowly, ever so gently, Will was leaning toward him, blue eyes wide. Blue eyes, filled with fire.

And Nico…Nico decided to stop thinking altogether.

Because Will's mouth was on his, so, so _softly,_ his lips like rose petals. Nico leaned into him, letting his hands find Will's shirt, pulling him closer.

Everything was quiet—for once, Nico's mind as well.

It was easy to shut off his endless spiraling thoughts. Because Will was here, and Will _was kissing him_ and Nico felt the frost that had crept over his heart beginning to melt.

Will left a trail of kisses across Nico's jaw, fingers grazing his neck ever-so-tenderly, as if taking immense care in every action. Nico inhaled, breathing in the smell of him—he smelled faintly of antiseptic and citrus, a strange combination, but not altogether off-putting.

Will pulled away, yet remained close enough for Nico to kiss him again if he wanted to. Will's eyes darted across Nico's face.

"I'm sorry," he said in hushed tones.

"Why are you sorry?" said Nico, still too shocked by what had just happened to properly process a thought.

"I should have asked first."

Nico rolled his eyes.

"Will, if I didn't want to kiss you, I wouldn't have."

At that Will visibly brightened, a smile brighter than the fire lighting up his face.

"Can I kiss you again?"

"Please."

And he did.

Nico smiled as Will's lips met his once more. And the rain continued to patter against the window panes, in a pattern steadier than Nico's racing heart.

 **This chapter made me so happy to write. Seriously. Also, I'd just like to add that this story is far from over. If anything, this is just the beginning. I've got the whole plot laid out, so you can look forward to a lot more content. Any ideas on what will happen next, or what you would want to see?**

 **-Sid**


	20. Chapter 20

The next morning, it took Nico a while to figure out where he was.

He woke slowly. He was laying on his back, staring at an unfamiliar ceiling. This wasn't his ceiling. The ceiling in his apartment was cracked and stained by water damage. This ceiling was covered in pristine white paint, crisscrossed in hanging paper lanterns.

Nico sat up, running a hand through his tangled hair.

 _Oh._

He was in Will's apartment, on his couch. He remembered now. Will had offered to let him sleep over on his couch. Nico knew he should have refused, but for whatever reason, he hadn't.

Nico touched his lips gently. He could remember it all so well—Will kissing him. _Will kissing him._ It felt like a dream. If he hadn't woken up on Will's couch, he might not have believed that it had happened at all. Maybe that's why he had stayed. Some part of him knew that only this would convince him that he hadn't imagined the whole thing.

 _Will had kissed him._

He couldn't believe it. How many years had he spent trying to convince himself that him liking boys was wrong? And yet, kissing Will had completely erased that notion in his head. Kissing Will not only made him feel right—it made him feel whole again. He hadn't even realized that part of him was missing until Will's hands were in his hair, Will's mouth on his.

Nico swung his legs over the side of the couch, stretching his arms high over his head. He felt his back crackle as he stretched.

The windows were uncovered, letting in bleak early morning light. The drifting clouds that obscured the sun painted watery shadows on the walls. The rain had probably stopped sometime last night, but Nico hadn't noticed. He'd been…quite distracted, to say the least.

Sitting on the couch, still in his clothes from yesterday, hopelessly crinkled, Nico smiled. Not a halfway, humorless smile. A real one. It felt strange, but in a good way.

The smell of brewing coffee caught his attention. He turned toward the kitchen to see Will there, wearing an oversized baby-blue sleep shirt and yellow plaid pajama bottoms. His feet were bare, and his hair, normally wavy, looked ridiculous, sticking up in all directions. He probably hadn't brushed it yet.

Will looked over, catching sight of Nico. Will smiled brightly—brighter than Nico had ever seen (which really was something considering that Will's smiles were like sunshine itself).

"Good morning, sunshine," said Will, stepping into the living room with two cups of steaming coffee. He took a seat next to Nico.

"Your hair's a mess," said Nico. He paused only a split second before giving it a ruffle. Will laughed.

"Yours isn't much better," said Will, handing him one of the cups.

Nico took a sip. It was perfect—not too hot, not too sweet.

"My hair's always like this," said Nico. It was true.

"Not everyone wakes up with artfully tousled hair like Nico DiAngelo," said Will, smiling over the rim of his cup.

The conversation faded to silence, but it was a comfortable one. A steady, still, companionable silence.

"So, about last night…" Will began.

Nico glanced up at him, feeling a prickle of nervousness begin to creep over his skin. Was Will about to tell him that kissing him hadn't really meant anything? Nico was positive that if Will said that, it would shatter him.

"Yeah?"

Will's eyes flickered to Nico's.

"I just wanted to say that I really…liked kissing you," he said. He laughed, sounding timid. He rubbed a hand over his neck.

"You weren't too bad yourself," said Nico evenly. He couldn't help but wonder where this was going.

"God, I'm terrible at this. I guess what I'm trying to say is…I really _like you_ , Nico."

Nico blinked. He had imagined Will saying those exact words, but never thought that he'd hear them out loud.

"You do?" he said quietly.

"Why are you so surprised?" asked Will, eyebrows lifting.

"Because I'm so…dark," said Nico lamely.

Will rolled his eyes. "No you're not."

 _Yes I am,_ thought Nico. _You don't know the half of it._

"You're just…so bright and so happy and…" began Nico. God, why was he doing this? Will was trying to tell him he liked him, something Nico had been wanting for weeks. And now Nico was trying to talk him out of it.

"Nico?"

" _Will_?"

Will kissed him, silencing the dismal thoughts racing through Nico's head. When Will pulled away, Nico felt dizzy.

"And your freckles look like constellations," finished Nico, nearly breathless.

Will smiled, pressing a kiss to Nico's forehead softly.

"Nico, will you be my boyfriend?"

"Okay."

 _Okay._

 _Okay._


	21. Chapter 21

The next day Nico had classes, but he could barely focus. He couldn't stop thinking about Will. Will, his boyfriend. _His boyfriend_. It seemed too good to be true.

Nico took his seat in English Literature, idly doodling on a scrap of paper. He barely noticed when Reyna sat beside him.

"Hello? Earth to Nico…are you even there, dude?"

Nico blinked at looked over at her. She was staring at him curiously.

"Sorry," he said, trying to shake himself from his thoughts (for the first time, not a symphony of inward criticism).

"Someone's distracted today," said Reyna with a smirk. Her eyes widened with sudden realization. "Wait, did something happen with Will?"

Nico felt a smile tugging at his lips.

Reyna gave him a shove. "Nico!"

Nico lowered his voice and spoke into her ear. "Will and I…kissed."

Her hands found her mouth. From the creases around her eyes Nico could tell she was beaming.

"Oh my god!" she exclaimed loudly. A few students looked over in bemusement, but Nico didn't care. He was too happy to care. "So are you guys like…dating now?"

Nico nodded.

Reyna pulled him into a hug so quickly that Nico didn't have time to react. After a second he wrapped his arms around her as well.

"I'm so happy for you," she said, her breath tickling his ear. "Seriously. So happy."

"Yeah," said Nico, smiling into the folds of her scarf. "Me too."

 **Hey guys! I hope you don't mind the short chapters. I find it easier to post chunks of the story like this. What's your favorite part so far? I'd love to know what you liked about it :)**

 **-Sid**


	22. Chapter 22

In art class Nico couldn't focus, even more so because Will was sitting _right next to him_ , nudging his knee with his own under the table. Nico didn't even mind that it was making all of his lines crooked. He didn't care what his art looked like. All he wanted to do was draw Will. Will, and his constellation freckles. Will, smiling at him with near-cartoon stars in his eyes.

Nico knew that if he were to look in a mirror he'd have the same stars in his eyes.

At the end of class they walked through the campus together, Reyna on one side of him, Will on the other. Nico couldn't remember being happier.

And then Will's fingers wove themselves between his own and then, _then_ he could remember being happier.

"So you're like, boyfriends now?" said Reyna as they walked.

"Yep," said Will.

"I swear, if you two start making out in front of me, I'm going to throw up," she warned.

"I don't know, Reyna," said Nico with a smirk in her direction. "That's kind of a tall order."

Will laughed. Reyna laughed. Nico's stomach soared.

They all went to a nearby cafe for coffee and pastries, sitting at a high table by the window. The weather had started to brighten ever so slightly, spikes of sunlight piercing through the heavy blanket of clouds.

They talked about everything and nothing at all and for a moment it was as if the last two years hadn't happened. Nico could hardly believe how sad he'd been. It was impossible to feel sad now, with Will sitting next to him, a hand on his knee, bleeding warmth through Nico's black jeans.

Halfway through coffee Will's phone buzzed. He took it out of his pocket and frowned at the screen.

"Who is it?" asked Reyna, taking a sip of her coffee. It was the same color as her eyes.

Will didn't respond. Instead, he typed out a quick text and sent it before tucking the phone back into his pocket.

"Well?" asked Nico.

Will glanced over at him, a crease between his eyebrows.

"My old roommate. Again," said Will.

Reyna suddenly became very interested in her blueberry muffin. Nico immediately realized that she knew something he didn't.

Nico decided not to prod for an answer. Whatever the deal was with this old roommate of Will's, it seemed to be upsetting him. Nico didn't want him to be upset. So he didn't ask.

Instead, he vowed to ask Reyna about it later.

 **Hmmm...any ideas on what's up with the roommate? Also, I've been trying to update a chapter every day, but things have gotten quite hectic. I'll still be working on the story, but there'll probably be more time between each chapter. I'll try and get as much done as I can before I leave for college in September :)**

 **-Sid**


	23. Chapter 23

Two days later, Nico hadn't talked to Reyna about the mysterious roommate. It had, quite literally, slipped his mind. It was much too easy to dwell on Will's dimples and the tiny curls of golden hair that grew around the base of his neck.

Nico spent much more time over at Will's apartment now, but he went back to his apartment occasionally, just to check up on things. He realized that he needed to reserve some time to himself—even though he enjoyed Will's company immensely, it still exhausted him at times. That hadn't changed.

It was on one of these nights that Nico lay in bed, scrolling through emails on his phone, when an alert popped up. A text message, from Jason.

Nico blinked. Though he felt terrible admitting it, he had nearly forgotten about Jason.

 _SO REYNA TOLD ME YOU AND WILL ARE A THING NOW?!_

Nico sighed. Of course Jason would find out. He always did.

He typed a quick reply.

 _Yep._

Jason responded with a flurry of emoticons and garbled letters. Nico could practically see him in his mind's eye, freaking out.

 _You and me. Coffee tomorrow. We'll talk about this._

Nico sighed. He should have known that this was inevitable. Besides, he hadn't seen Jason since the New Year's Eve party. It would be nice to meet up with him again.

They met at a coffee shop near Jason's apartment. Nico got there first, and he waited in the furthermost corner, in a squashy leather arm chair. Not soon after Jason arrived, grinning like an idiot when he spotted Nico. He hurried over and took a seat in the empty chair beside him.

"I can't believe it," he said, a bit breathlessly. He sounded as if he had run there. And perhaps he had. "I mean, I can believe it but I'm just—" he paused, taking a breath. "I'm just so happy for you," he finished.

Nico smiled.

"Me too," he said. "Honestly, I didn't think it was going to happen."

Jason leaned forward a little.

"So like, how did it happen? I need details, Nico."

"God, you're annoying," said Nico, though his words lacked irritability. "We just started hanging out a lot and then…he kissed me."

Jason let out a gasp.

"Will _kissed_ you?"

"Yes…?"

Jason fell back into his chair, a hand clutching his heart.

"This is too much," he said. Nico had forgotten how ridiculously overdramatic he could be whenever something good happened to Nico.

"It's not that big of a deal," said Nico, though even he could hear the lie in his words. Of course it was a big deal. This was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

"We should hang out, all three of us," said Jason cheerily.

"Uhh…"

Nico could imagine exactly how that would go. Jason, freaking out every time Nico and Will made eye contact. Jason, acting like a proud parent, fawning over the two of them. Absolutely not.

"Maybe," he said instead.

Jason's smile was so bright, Nico had to look away.

 **Sorry for the delay! A lot has been going on, and I've been trying to coordinate a short film I'm working on. I hope you enjoyed this chapter! More will be on the way. In the meantime, please review! It helps A LOT.**

 **-Sid**


	24. Chapter 24

They lay on a checkered picnic blanket, Nico and Will. The sun shone high and bright overheard, visible for the first time in weeks. The sky was a calm azure, dotted with wispy clouds.

"The sun feels nice," said Will. His fingers found Nico's.

Nico glanced over at him without lifting his head from the blanket. Will had his eyes closed, and gravity had tugged his hair away from his forehead, making him appear younger. Vulnerable.

"You're like a plant," murmured Nico. He didn't much care for the sun, but it felt nice to lay beside Will on the grass.

"A plant?"

"Yeah. It's like you're photosynthesizing."

Will laughed and rolled over onto his side, burying his face in the crook between Nico's chin and shoulder. Nico tried not to giggle—but god, it tickled.

"Will, stop," complained Nico, pretending to sound offended.

Will laughed again, the sound echoing against Nico's neck. This time, Nico did laugh.

"Jesus Christ, guys, _I'm right here_."

Nico sat up, pulling Will with him. Reyna sat beside them on the picnic blanket, wearing circular sunglasses and a look of utmost irritation.

"Sorry," said Will sheepishly, though his hand snaked its way around Nico's waist.

Reyna shook her head. "I can't go anywhere with you two. It's like you forget I'm here."

"I'm sorry that our affections disturb you," said Will in a ridiculous posh accent. He kissed Nico on the cheek. Reyna pretended to throw up.

Will's phone buzzed. He took it out and glanced at the screen. A frown tugged his lips downward.

"Roommate?" asked Nico.

Will looked over at him, surprise on his face.

"How did you—?"

"Well, every time you get a text and you look upset, it's from your roommate," said Nico, keeping his voice perfectly even though nervousness had begun a steady rhythm in his stomach.

Will sighed and put his phone back in his pocket.

"What happened between you two?" Nico continued. He was shocked by his own daring. Usually he never interfered in other's personal affairs. That's why he found it so irksome that Jason was always involving himself in his own business.

Reyna shifted uncomfortably.

"I don't think it's that important…" began Will. He glanced over at Reyna as if searching for back up. Reyna wouldn't meet his eyes.

"It is important," said Nico. "If it's making you upset, I want to know what it is."

Will took a deep breath, letting his eyes rest on his lap, away from Nico.

"Well…my roommate actually used to be my boyfriend," said Will.

"Oh," said Nico. He wasn't sure why those words hurt so much. Why was it surprising that Will had dated other people? Of course he would have. Of course…

"And we were still together when he left for Australia," continued Will. His voice was getting quieter and quieter. "But when I realized that I liked you, I broke up with him."

Nico couldn't believe it.

" _What?_ "

Will looked up at him. There was a fragile look in his blue eyes.

"And he didn't take it well. We'd been dating for about a year…"

"Wait. Hold up." Nico's blood was pounding through his veins quicker than he could keep up. None of what Will was saying made any sense. "You left him for _me_?"

"Yeah," said Will. "It's not that big of a deal. It'd been coming on for weeks…"

Reyna had feigned a sudden interest in the grass.

"You shouldn't have left him for me," said Nico quietly. He felt like his heart was going to burst out of his chest.

Will took his hand again, looking at him imploringly.

"Nico, I _had to_. And it's fine. This happens. People grow apart."

Nico wanted to believe him. But all he could think about was himself in that position, halfway across the world, Will breaking up with him for someone else.

"You gotta admit, it was a little screwed up," said Reyna, contributing to the conversation at last.

Will shook his head, blonde curls bouncing. He met Nico's eyes again. His irises seemed to be glowing with determination.

"Nico, I understand that this might sound bad. But I only did it because I knew that if I didn't, it would drive me crazy. We're on good terms now, I swear. Things have just been weird because he's coming back for a little while…"

Nico let his eyes flicker shut. He should have known that this was too good to be true. God, what if they met?

Will's hands were on his elbows.

"Nico, say something."

Nico opened his eyes, looking directly at Will. In his mind he traced a pattern across Will's freckles. He couldn't bear the thought of losing Will, not now that he was finally his. Not now that he finally belonged somewhere.

"It's fine," said Nico, his words sounding hollow. "I'm not happy about it, but we'll figure it out."

Will kissed his nose lightly.

Nico barely managed to hide his frown.

 **Hey guys! I'm so happy that you're enjoying the story so far. I've been working on it for so long that it's so cool to finally be able to share it with the world. This is where the plot starts to thicken, so stay tuned! Also, I thought it'd be really cool if anyone wanted to draw some scenes from the story? That'd be amazing. I'm feverfooted on tumblr, so you can find me there (I'd love to talk to you guys too, so you should drop by!) Thanks for sticking with my story!**

 **-Sid**


	25. Chapter 25

Nico sat in the library, idly doodling on a scrap of paper. Technically, he was supposed to be writing an essay for his Literature class, but his thoughts were much too scattered to focus on something as dull as an essay.

At this very moment, Will was at the airport, picking up his old roommate. Cecil was his name, Reyna had told him.

Nico breathed in deeply before scratching out the drawing with his pen. It didn't make much of a difference—he had, unknowingly, been drawing a storm ripping through a city.

After the picnic, Nico had gone back to his apartment and sat alone in the silence and gloom. The thoughts were coming back to him—the dark, incessant thoughts that felt like they were picking him apart piece by piece.

He had tried to stay positive. Really, he had. But he couldn't help but feel like this thing he had with Will (really, what _was_ it?) was morphing into a creature that would sooner devour him than put him back on his feet. He was beginning to think that his relationship with Will had been a mistake from the very beginning.

And that was the scariest thought of them all.

"Hey, you alright?"

Reyna slid into the chair across from him, setting her book bag down between her feet. She wore a jean jacket and a violet scarf. Worry traced her eyes like makeup.

"Yeah," said Nico with a shrug, subtly tucking his doodle away beneath one of his books. If she noticed, she didn't say anything about it.

Reyna scooted her chair closer to his, keeping just enough distance between them so Nico wouldn't feel closed in. Nico was always grateful for Reyna's way of quiet courtesy.

"Nico, you don't need to lie to me," she said softly. It was early evening, and the library was filled with restless chatter. It sounded a bit like wind through sparse leaves.

Nico met her eyes, a pang of guilt flaring through him when he saw how concerned she looked.

"I don't know how to feel," Nico admitted. He hadn't planned on saying that, but as soon as the words passed over his tongue he realized it was true. "I really…don't know why Will would have left him for me. I've been thinking about it a lot and…" Nico trailed off. He hoped Reyna could fill in the blanks.

Reyna nodded.

"I'm not saying that I agree with what Will did—"

Nico glanced at her with alarm.

"—but I'm _glad_ he did it. Broke up with Cecil, I mean. You're so much better together. Trust me. They had a good run, but Will and Cecil weren't meant for each other. They were always fighting about something—it was exhausting, really."

Nico let his eyes drop back down to his lap. He wanted to believe her. He did. But it was proving awfully difficult. Especially when he remembered the photographs decorating Will's walls, the photographs of him and a boy he didn't know smiling together, arms draped around each other. This other boy had a room in that apartment, had a bed and pillows dented with the memory of his existence. His life was inextricably linked with Will's. And Nico…Nico was just a shadow, passing through.

But he couldn't say this to Reyna. He didn't know how to explain it, his feeling of impermanence. After two years of drifting, he had thought that he was ready to settle down. Will had provided a reason for him to stay. But if Will wasn't really his…where was he supposed to go?

"I'm afraid," whispered Nico, not daring to look at her.

He felt her hand on his arm.

"It's okay," she assured him, in the same hushed tones. "You'll be okay. Trust me."

Nico tried not to hear the worry in her voice.

 **Hey guys! Sorry for the inactivity. Writer's block hit me like a brick wall. Please review and let me know what you think will happen/what you'd like to see! I have a plot laid out but it definitely has room for some additions. I hope you're still enjoying the story!**


	26. Chapter 26

The next day Will wasn't in art class. Nico sat beside Reyna, his mind only half on his sketch. His thoughts had wandered to wherever Will could possibly be. Was he with Cecil? Had he decided that he'd rather be with Cecil instead?

"Hey, Nico."

Nico looked over at Reyna.

"Stop it," she said, before turning back to her own drawing.

"Stop what?" he questioned.

"You're thinking bad thoughts."

"No I'm—"

"Nico." She raised an eyebrow in his direction. "I can tell."

Nico scowled and attacked his sketch with a flurry of pencil strokes.

"Careful, there, Mr. DiAngelo," said Mr. Brunner from the side of the classroom. He was making his usual rounds around the desks, inspecting his students' work. "You're going to rip a hole through your notebook if you keep it up."

Nico simply redoubled his efforts.

The tip of his pencil punctured a hole through the page he was working on. Nico felt an odd pang of satisfaction.

—

 _Hey Nico where are you?_

Nico glanced at the dim screen of his cell phone before tucking it back into his jacket pocket.

He walked until the early morning light caressed the dismal London skyline.

He tried to ignore the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach that wouldn't seem to leave.


	27. Chapter 27

Nico stayed home.

He had never spent so much time in his apartment before, at least not all at once.

He lay on his bed, staring upward at the water stains that bloomed across the low ceiling. At this point he had enough money to move into a nicer apartment, but he just hadn't gotten around to it. He figured it would be more of an inconvenience than anything.

He tried to ignore the voice in the back of his head, without much luck.

 _You haven't switched apartments yet because you were hoping Will would ask you to move in with him, right?_

Nico rolled over and buried his face in his pillow. It smelled stale and musty.

He wanted nothing more than to see Will. But he couldn't bring himself to text him. He couldn't shake the feeling that Will was off with Cecil, having much more fun than he could ever have with Nico. The last thing Nico wanted to do was to be a burden.

It had only been a day, but Nico missed Will with an intensity that startled him. He felt it like an ache eating away at his insides.

It was then that a knock came from the front door. A quiet, timid knock.

Nico sat up quickly, the comforter crinkling beneath him.

"Hello?"

A wave of shock rushed through him. No…it couldn't possibly be.

Apprehensive, Nico crossed the small stretch of floor separating his bed from the front door. He turned the doorknob slowly.

"Oh thank god."

Nico was pushed backwards into the apartment. Will's arms were around him— _Will's arms were around him_ —and Will's face was buried in his neck.

For a split second he felt nothing but joy. Nico wrapped his arms around Will, pulling him closer, breathing in the familiar smell of him. He had missed this, the warmth that encased him whenever Will was close.

And then he realized that Will was _here_ , in Nico's sorry excuse for an apartment. He remembered why he had been avoiding him in the first place.

Nico pulled away, yet he didn't release Will completely. He physically couldn't bring himself to let him go. Instead, he held him by the elbows, looking up at him. The space between them was a sentient being, writhing with unsaid words.

"I'm so happy to see you," said Will. He was smiling, but Nico could tell that he was worried.

"Me too," said Nico. That, at least, was true.

"Where have you been?" said Will. "I looked for you yesterday but Reyna said she had no idea where you went…you scared me."

Nico lifted a hand to Will's face, touching his cheek softly. His skin was almost feverishly warm.

"I'm sorry," said Nico quietly. "I just had some thinking to do."

Will nodded, though he looked a bit exasperated. "You could have at least responded to my text," he said.

"I didn't see it," Nico lied.

"Oh."

Will's eyes left Nico's face. With a spike of embarrassment Nico realized he was looking at his apartment.

"So…this is where you live?" said Will. He was keeping his voice neutral, Nico could tell. He was probably disgusted. Nico couldn't blame him. He fully accepted the fact that his apartment was dingy and awful and probably a health hazard. He never really worried about it because he was the only one that lived there. But now…

"Yeah," said Nico. "How did you find me, by the way?" he added, trying to divert Will's attention. He seemed to have discovered the bizarre pattern of stains on the ceiling.

"Jason," said Will, turning back to Nico. He looked unsettled.

"Of course," murmured Nico. He should have known that Jason would tell Will.

"I'm sorry," said Will. "I shouldn't have come unannounced. I was worried, that's all. And I wanted to see you. Needed to see you."

Nico's eyes found his feet.

" _I'm_ sorry," he said.

"Why's that?"

"You have to see my disaster of an apartment."

Will laughed gently, pulling Nico close again. Nico let his eyes fall shut. It was easy to forget everything when Will's warmth cocooned him. Too easy.

"No offense, but why don't you get a different apartment? Or move into a dorm on campus?" Will asked. His chin rested on the top of Nico's head, and Nico could feel the vibrations of his words as he spoke.

"I don't know," said Nico into the folds of Will's shirt. "I just never got around to it."

Will took a step forward, pushing Nico backward gently. They sat beside each other at the foot of Nico's bed. Will draped an arm around Nico's waist, keeping him close.

Nico kept his eyes closed. If he didn't look, he could almost imagine that they were back in Will's apartment, where the smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the air and sunshine poured through the wide windows. He didn't want to see his frayed carpet and the flaking paint on the walls.

And then, relying on an instinct he couldn't possibly have named, Nico tilted his head upward, bringing his face to Will's.

Will needed no further encouragement. He brought his mouth down on Nico's, kissing him slowly and languidly, spreading a starburst of honey-colored warmth through Nico's chest. Nico pressed closer still, yearning for this feeling he had so missed.

Nico's fingers were in Will's hair, twining his blond hair past his knuckles. Will breathed a sigh that sounded of relief and Nico caught it between his teeth.

"Nico," whispered Will. His lips were on Nico's cheek, grazing a path to his chin.

"Will," replied Nico. He never got tired of saying it. Never ceased to love the name curving off his tongue.

For a moment, Nico pretended that everything was okay.

 **Hey guys! Another chapter just for you (since honestly you're awesome). Thanks as always for reading and taking the time to leave reviews! It really really helps me continue the story. If you want to talk or ask questions about the story or anything, you can message me at .com**

 **-Sid**


	28. Chapter 28

After who knew how much time had passed, the broke away from each other. It was infinitely harder than it should have been.

They sat in silence for a moment, side by side on Nico's bed.

"How's Cecil?" asked Nico, breaking the silence.

He didn't have to look over to see Will flinch.

"Nico, you know that him and I aren't together anymore."

"That's not what I asked."

Will took a deep breath, letting it filter out between his teeth in a hiss.

"He's fine. A bit irritable, but fine. He even has a bit of an accent now…"

Will trailed off. Nico remained silent.

Will nudged Nico's knee with his own.

" _You're_ my boyfriend, Nico. You know that," continued Will. Every word sounded hesitant and careful.

 _For how much longer?_ the voice in Nico's head whispered. He tried to push it away but it lingered, echoing through the space between his ears.

"Will?"

"Yes?"

Nico turned slightly to face him. A single beam of late-afternoon sunlight had filtered through the grimy windows, lighting Will's hair on fire. It seemed to glow gold, flickering with every minute movement he made.

"Why did you break up with him for me?"

Will's eyes darted across his. The silence swelled.

"Because I had to."

" _Why_?"

"Because—" Will gestured idly in the air in front of him, evidently searching for the right words. "Because," he started again, this time more sure of himself. "Because I knew, from the second I saw you, that I was falling out of love with him."

Nico rolled his eyes. "That's the cheesiest—"

Will took his hands and looked at him imploringly, as if begging him to understand with the still waters hidden in his irises.

"Nico, I couldn't help it. I was drawn to you, for god knows what reason. I knew that our paths had crossed for a reason."

Nico felt as if he had heard all of this in some B-rate romance film, but he remained quiet. He could tell that Will was being serious.

"When I was with Cecil, there was something that always felt a bit off," said Will. "We never really matched."

"And _we_ match?" questioned Nico, skeptical.

"We _match_ ," repeated Will. His fingers tightened around Nico's.

"Cecil and I would always be fighting about something. We never agreed. But you…you make sense."

Nico blinked slowly, letting the words sink in.

In the end, it was too hard trying to come up with some sort of argument. Will wanted him—Will cared about him. And Nico wasn't about to try to stop that.

But indeed, he was terrified. Terrified of things slipping out of control again. He couldn't let that happen. He couldn't lose himself again.

And, more importantly, he couldn't lose Will.

 **Hey guys. Sorry for the lack of activity. I've had the worst writer's block and everything I've been writing just seemed a little off. I can't promise that there will be other chapters soon, but I'm definitely not abandoning this story. I've just got to get my creativity going again.**

 **Thanks for being patient! I really appreciate it.**

 **-Sid**


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